THE LIFE OF...

PEACE, LOVE & COCO

2011-02-18T10:54:00.000-08:00

For the most part the life of coco has been good. So, so much has changed since i last blogged and it will be awhile before i get back into blogging. So until then Peace, Love & Coco =)

Zack Randall, another love of my life

2010-09-13T01:56:00.000-07:00

Zack Randall is another love of my life. We first met at LA Pride while he was working one of the porn booths. We became instant friends, Zack is so adorable, He's uber smart with a sexy body.

Zack and I at Tigerheat for his Freshman Of The Year Cover. Also met his husband Derek Rivero that night and oh the fun we had.

Zack Randall doing his thing and yes he's gets a

YUMMY!!!

Brent Everett, AMAZING!!!

2010-09-13T00:25:00.000-07:00

Brent Everett, what can i say about him? I have yet to meet one person who doesn't want a piece of him lol. Brent is such an amazing guy, so, so funny and playful and hella smart, yes hella. =) i believe Brent and i first started chatting on twitter and then ended up meeting at an award ceremony for porn stars. That night was so much fun, i also hand the pleasure of meeting his husband, Steve.

Brent Everett definitely get my

YUMMY!!!

A link to his blog is at the end of pics.

http://brenteverettblog.blogspot.com/

Giovanni Summers, one of the many loves of my life

2010-09-12T11:32:00.000-07:00

Giovanni Summers is one of the best friends i could ever ask for. He is as real as they come, full of life, full of love and is just an amazing guy that i had the pleasure of meeting. When we met he was a porn star visiting from Chicago. We had a night out on the town and hit up WeHo and OMG what a night =)

Today Giovanni no longer does porn, he's following his dreams of being a Nurse, Chef and God knows what else lol. He has lots of dreams and i know he will reach every one of them.

Here are pics of his porn star days and he will always get a YUMMY!!! from me.

He is one of the many loves of my life and theres not one bad thing i could ever say about him...... well except that, lol JK.

At the bottom of the pics is a link to all his videos.

http://www.rockettube.com/giovannisummers

Cody Kyler, porn star turn fashion designer

2010-09-12T00:14:00.000-07:00

Let me introduce you to my friend Cody Kyler, porn star turned Fashion designer. Earlier this year he moved from Chicago to West Hollywood to pursue a career in fashion design, mainstream print modeling, and television. He signed an exclusive contract with Flava Works and that's a tall order for only being 19, but when you're hot and young, you can do anything you want, especially in West Hollywood!

No worries tho he say's he's only leaving the industry "for a minute,"

Winning The Award

and the reason why he won =)

YUMMY!!!

David Beckham, it gets the job done for me lol

2010-09-11T23:16:00.000-07:00

David Beckham is in my opinion the hottest soccer player out there. He's fucken fashionable, smart, a body to die for, lets just say i'd like to lick him from head to toe lol.

He definitely get a YUMMY!!! from me.

Here's a pic of David, now i don't know if it's real but it gets the job done for me lol.

Simon Rex was a gay porn star

2010-09-11T21:43:00.000-07:00

Simon Rex, is such a hottie but in my opinion its because he's goofy. He's funny, and cute, great body and he's adorable. I remeber when these pics first came out i was like HOT DAMN!!! Simon, did gay porn, the sad thing is he's not gay =( but hey at least we get to watch him do his thing. MMM MMM MMM =)

at the bottom is a link to a couple of his video's, watch them, so hot.

http://manhuntdaily.com/2010/06/celebrity-skin-simon-rex/

All i want to know is why?

2010-09-11T20:44:00.000-07:00

So i been going through a lot of shit lately. I thought i was over it, i try to pretend that i'm ok and nothing is wrong with me but the truth is i'm hurt. Friends come to me all the time crying about some guy that did them wrong, about whatever drama is going on in their life but i have no one to go to about my drama, about my pain. Sure they always tell me, they're there for me and i can tell them anything but i learned a long time ago, the hard way not to trust anyone. Its sad i rather put my shit online for the world to read then to trust just one person.

Well here it is, i'm just going to type and this may not all make sense but there it is.

I'm sad all the time, feel like crying everyday but i don't allow myself because i rather feel nothing then to feel anything at all. Guys always tell me how cute i em, how nice i em, what a great smile, beautiful eyes. Then they ask why don't have a boyfriend? Well thats because no one actually wants me. I'm always the friend nothing more. My friends come to me all the time with their guy problems. Why is he acting this way? What should i do? Should i wait for him to call? ETC. Hell guys come to me with their girl problems and i always get them back on track and let them know everything will work out. You know something i'v never had a boyfriend, hell i'v never even been on a date before. So tell me, please, whats wrong wrong with me? is me being fat the only reason no one wants me?

I'm tired, tired of being alone, tired of being sad, tired of having to fake the happiness, tired of having to put on a smile everyday, i'm tired of feeling lost, i'm tired of being hurt. 2 guys have hurt me in my life, the first was Alyues. Alyues was the first guy i ever fell for but in that time in my life he was the only gay guy i ever knew so i think thats a big reason of why i fell for him. After a year in a half i got over him and i also changed as a person. I became coco and i found a whole other world out there i never knew existed. In time i realized that Alyues was someone i could never be with, for many reasons, i also got my closure. The second guy to hurt me is Anthony, he just deleted me out his life and i don't know why. Did i do something wrong? Anthony is someone i'v talked about in many of my post because after finding myself and realizing what i want and the type of person i want to be with, he was that person. Although like everyone else he and i were just friends. Then one day he just stops talking to me, deletes me from his facebook and after 3 months i find a picture on his facebook of us from the very first time we met. A picture he i never tagged him in, a picture he had to of take from my page. Then today i have a notice on my a4a that he checked out my profile. What the fuck? Now i know i'm thinking way to much into it but all i can say is WHAT THE FUCK? all i want to know is why?

Brad Pitt, one of the hottest men alive

2010-09-10T21:53:00.000-07:00

Brad Pitt, in my opinion is one of the hottest men alive today. I been in love with him since Thelma & Louise. He has the face, the attitude, the body and the brains. These are some pics taken of him years ago.

He gets a YUMMY!!!

Taylor Hanson, Real or Fake?

2010-09-10T21:26:00.000-07:00

So growing up i never, ever liked the Hanson's but i must say Taylor Hanson is definitely the hot brother of the three. He's married and has 4 kids i think but when i came across these pictures i was like MMM MMM MMM HOT DAMN!!!

Drake Bell

2010-09-10T15:34:00.000-07:00

Drake, what can i say, i didn't really care for him till i got my hands on these pictures.

OMG!!!! YUMMY!!! =)

Zac Efron

2010-09-10T15:21:00.000-07:00

Ok first off, in my opinion Zac gay or not he is fucking yummy, seriously, have you seen his body? i mean OMG!!!

OH MY DRAG!!!

2010-08-03T14:47:00.000-07:00

The other day i decided i wanted to dress up in drag as much as i could, working with what i got at home. Well this is what came out.

My Dream/Nightmare Last Night

2010-07-02T11:41:00.000-07:00

So last night i had this dream that started off really well and then turned kinda nightmarish. It starts off with a group of us going to some kind of park but i dont really know everyone thats there. The only ones i can are Christina and Alyeus. CHristina is a friend of mine and has been for about 7 years now. Alyeus is, well lets just say he was someone i cared about a long time ago.

So we all get on this train to get to where we are going in this park and Alyeus and i end up sitting next to each other which makes things really awkward. but we get through the train rde and when we get off the train we're at this kind of fork in the road. One path going to our location i guess and the other going to, well at first i dont know what but it seemed to be funner then our original plans. so the whole group decides to go in that direction and everyone goes ahead of Alyeus and I. As Alyeus and i are walking we end up talking about a lot of things and then one thing leads to another and i start kissing him. Then i open his shirt and start to slowly kiss his chest and i work my way down to his stomach. then i begin to undo his belt as im kissing and licking his body, finally his pants come down and i start to kiss his pubic area and i begin to tantalize his penis and well you get the picture =)

We finally catch up to the group and we end up at some sort of maze. We enter the building or cave or something, im not really sure what it is. so we go in and as we start to walk through i start to feel terrified to be honest. I could just feel that this wasnt good. as we walk we already begin to get lost in this maze, there was no turning back now. as i look around me, the group in no more, now its just me, some black girl, Alyeus, Christina and some other chick. We move forward trying to find a way out and all of a sudden the walls begin to change which means the maze changed too. as we walk all of a sudden spikes come out of the wall splitting one girl in half, we try to save her but its to late. we start to run and another wall closes separating Alyeus from us and all we can hear are screams, screams for his life. finally its clear to us that we arnt going to make it out of here alive. but all we can do it try. We continue to walk and we notice that we arnt alone in this maze, someone else is in here. All i can see of him is black, like a ninja or something. so now not only are we trying to get out but we are tryn to get away from whatever is in here with us. we notice a light coming from a path we run to in and as we do a wall begins to slowly close ahead of us but we need tro get to whatever that light is. we start to run and the black girl and i make it through but christina ends up being killed smashed between the closng wall. I turn and look around, we are in this room but only have a small area to move, a sort of platform. i look down and i see vents or tunnels, maybe tubes. the kind you see at a play area in a fast food restaurant, only these were metal and at the bottom all water. It was also our only way out but i just knew it was to easy. it was a feeling i had, some sorf of trick. so we stood there as i continued to examin the whole situation and whith my eyes i follow each tube to see where they ended. Each tube led to a dead end except one. terrified we entered the tobes not knowing what was going to happen. next thing i know we come out to a hallway maybe 15 feet long and there in front of us is day light. I look around and notice a curtain and something just doesnt seem right and at this point the black girl and i finally speak to each other. I tell her everything is going to be ok and we are going to get out of here. I tell her to stay close, i also tell her i have a bad feeling. as we slowly make our way to the outside world a sword cuts through the curtain and the black figur grabs the black girl. I run through the curtain to find her and save her and once again i find myself in a room not knowing where to go. I hear her scream and i follow it. i see her, then i dont. finally i find her in a corner and i tell her again, its ok now, we are gonna get out of here. i take her hand and i begin to take her the way i came in and the black figur is coming again and i think to myself, this time its not taking either of us. I grab her hand tighter and we begin to run finanlly we are outside but we are on top of a cliff and its either we jump or the black figur will get us. all of a sudden ou of nowhere there's these red balloons i grab them and i give one to her and i say its our only hope. We jump and we begin glid down and throught the trees till we land safely on the ground. after we hit the ground we just ran, ran far away from that place. then it was time for me to get up and that ended my dream/nightmare.

Sorry if any of this is hard to understand. And if anyone knows what all this means PLEASE let me know.

I HAD A DREAM

2010-06-28T22:50:00.001-07:00

Last night i had this dream that i wrote a book about my life, it was titled, "From losing Alex to becoming Coco". Basically its about my childhood, growing up, coming out, being gay, love, heartbreak, sex, losing myself and finding a new me.

What do you think, does it scream Best Seller??? =)

BRIAN'S BIRTHDAY!!!

2010-06-17T15:30:00.000-07:00

Last night i went to Mary's for Brian's Birthday bash and OMG it was so much fun. We watched the drag show then had a few drinks and just talked with friends. I planned to stay for about an hour but ended up stayn the whole night lol.

Like I said before, HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!! Hope you had fun.

LET'S TALK "ANTHONY"

2010-06-15T10:26:00.000-07:00

Ok so the thing with Anthony is, yeah I like him, I like him a lot, what else can I say other than, I'm falling for him. I met Anthony at club lucky when it was at RED through Mark, The second i saw him, I found him attractive and shy, then i got to talking with him that night and had fun. Later that week he called me and asked if i was going to be at Varsity a club in irvine because he wanted to see me, so of corse i went. That night we danced a lil and talked a lot and not only was he attractive and shy but he was smart and going to school. He loves playing video games and he has big dreams. That night i felt comfortable with him and i told him that there was this guy that was bothering me at the club and there really was. This guy wanted to get with me but i was not having it, so anyways some other guy came up and Anthony thought it was him so he put his arm around me and just held me. I loved it =)

That night the guy that came up to me, his name was patick and we got to talking and at first i was like whatever but then he asked if he could kiss me and i was like UMMMM, ok, lol. Mark then invited me over to their place in San Diego for the weekend. So why not i went and when i got there Anthony came and jumped in my car so that he could help me get a parking. Then he asked me if i Slept with "that guy"? I told him no, in fact i never saw him after that night. That was the end of it and after a "lil" fight lol the weekend went really well. then came sunday and Anthony had Justin over and to make a story short, he was there to fuck him and it hurt and made me mad so i left. The whole story is in another blog. Anyways after that weekend we just stopped talking all together. A while back he posted something on his facebook and i commented on it and then sent him an IM saying that im here for him and since then it has gotn a lot better betweeen us. Like i mentioned in blogs before we spend a lot of time together now and we did LA Pride together and we text and talk on the phone a lot lol. Things are good, could be a lot better if you know what i mean lol.

I love being with him because he's funny, smart as hell, cute, dorky, sexy, he makes me laugh, he makes me comfortable and yet still gives me butterfly's in my stomach. I see how different he is from his friends, he's not as wild and crazy as them but still knows how to have fun. He loves playing video and comp. games, he's a health freak but not super crazy about it. He makes me feel safe and warm when im with him. I see him in ways that others dont. These are just some of the reasons why i've fallen for him.

Now the down side. To him we are just friends and even if i wanted to tell him how i feel, i know what his answer would be. Being around him so much i know what kind of guys he's into and i'm just not it. I'm short and fat, he like's tall, thin, cute and then some =) but he's not looking for a boyfriend because he's been hurt so in a way thats a good thing. To be honest as much as i love him and want to be with him all i want is for him to be happy, to find someone that makes him happy, that makes him smile everyday, someone that brings out the best in him, someone that push's him, someone that helps him reach his dreams and someone that he never stops thinking about all day long.

Ok well thats my dish on Anthony and my feelings toward him. now time to go have fun.

LA PRIDE 2010!!!

2010-06-15T09:33:00.000-07:00

Last thurs. i had planned to stay home but Anthony msged me and told me to go to Tigerheat, so i figured why not. That night was ok. I was bored because he didnt get there till almost 12am and i basically waited and spent the whole looking for him. On the other hand i did run into Sasha, his BF and there friends and made new friends. Finally when Anthony got there we danced a lil then went and hungout outside, we talked and walked around thats about all that happend. Then came the weekend, which was LA PRIDE! lol I went on sunday for the parade and it was hella good this year or maybe just because i actually payed attention to it lol. as soon as it was over Anthony called me to tell me he was there but had no clue where he was so i went and found him. He also came with a guy named Kody, whom i found out he fucked later that day, i'll write about my feelings towards this later. then we all went and found Mark and Marc. OMGm Mark was waisted before he even got to pride and well lets just say he didnt last very long there. Maybe a couple hours later Marc took Mark home, Anthony and Kody were dropped off at Kody's place not to far from pride beacuse they were coming back later. so i once again felt ditched but whatever's. A few minutes later Mark calls me and says Marc threw him out of the car in downtown la, so i being the friend i em' said, ok i'll be right there so i drove my ass there just to find out that Marc went and picked him back up and took him home so that honestly kinda made me mad. Although the good thing was, Anthony was on the phone with me the whole time. it was funny he called me to find out what i was doing then hung up. A minute later called again and was like hi , what are you doing? lol i was like what do you want baby? then we just talked and talked. finally he asked if i could go pick him up from kody's place because he didnt want to be there anymore. Well he wasnt far at all from where i was so sure, i went and picked him up. I guess Kody wanted to go with us but Anthony told him that we were going to a privet party and i could only take one guest lol. That being said Anthony and I ended up being together the rest of the night. Which was amazing. Now we didnt really do anything but watch Kelly Rowland perform then walked the streets of LA lol. he's under 21 and couldnt get into clubs and the one club he could get into he couldnt afford =)

He asked me if he could spend the night with me and as much as i would have loved that, i sadly live with my parents, so i just took him home and i spent the night there lol. i ended up leaving his place on monday, late afternoon. that ending my weekend.

SAN DIEGO

2010-06-08T20:55:00.000-07:00

WOW! What a weekend. Last fri. I headed out to San Diego to be with my baby boy's and that night we watched movie and just chilled. Sat. we got up and headed to black beach aka a nude beach and we had to climb down a cliff to get ther and back up to leave. lets just say for me going down was the easy part lol. Getting back up was a bitch and then some. Later that night we headed to johns house, now im not one for weed but OMG it was so cool to see how its grown and all the work they put into doing it. Anyways had a lil fun then headed to another guys house for his bday but he ignored us the whole time we were there, hell he even went to his room with his friends so it was clear we wernt wanted there so we left. Once we got back home, Anthony, Mark and I went to bed and Willie crashed on the sofa. Sun. we went shopping and Marc bought us MAKE UP and other goodies then headed back to johns for a BBQ. It was a really great weekend. Sometimes i just need to get away from it all and be with my friends.

HUGE CHANGES

2010-05-30T16:34:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since i last blogged about anything. Some little things that have happend: I'm unemployed, which finacially is not good but im happy and im not really caring about much right now. I'm feeling free so to speak. It's going to take some time for me to get back on my feet but i will, i just need to focus on what i want and right now i don't know what that is.

I'm starting a new life making some huge changes, finally making some real, true friends and starting to open up and let people into my life. I haven't felt this happy in so very long. last thurs. i went to LA to hangout with Mark and Anthony, later we picked up Willie and i did something i haven'd done in a very long time. This may sound stupid but i sang, lol. I don't remember the last time i really sang, it felt good. Anyways we all went out to dinner and walked the streets, cuz you know us ho's thats what we do lol. Then headed back to the hotel where we just chilled and had fun. By 8' o-clock we started to get ready for the club and lets just say we got waisted that night, lol. Willie and Anthony ended up leaving the club early and walked back to the hotel and past out on the bed, Mark and I stayed at the club the whole night and danced and stumbled around, hahaha. At 3am the club closed and we walked our drunk ass's back to the hotel. Fri. morning we got up and just chilled, played a lil dress up hahaha, put on a wig and we WORRKED IT! lol. Then came check out time and headed back home. such a great start to a LONG Memorial weekend.

Yesterday, Sat. my 2 brothers and sister-in-laws come over and we had a BBQ, it was actually kinda fun, did the whole family time which honestly cant remember when we ever did family time. by 10:30pm everyone left drunk lol and i just went online till 3am and guess what i finally fixed my comp., it works it really works!!! lol As for tonight i will be heading to The Shark club in Costa Mesa, this is gonna be one hell of a night =)

A NIGHT I SO NEEDED

2010-04-18T00:01:00.000-07:00

After such a long week of pain came Deirdre's Birthday, which was a night that was definetly needed. Last night Jonathan was suppose to come with me to go pick up Johnathan the gogo dancer from LA then head to LB to the club to celebrate D's bday but thank GOD Jonathan called and cancelled, i think it was best that way. Johnathan and i got to talking in the car on the drive to Long Beach, which was very nice because to be honest when i'm 1 on 1 with someone i come off very wierd, i dont have social skills with people but in a crowd i'm a socialite lol.

Finally we arrive to the club, i take his clothes to the dressing room and i enjoy the rest of my night. I started drinking drink after drink after drink lol. hey people were buying them for me so why not =) then in walks Thiago and i say hi but dont pay to much attention to him, honestly i dont know what happend between us. it's like the connection we had is just gone. we wernt exactly best friends but we were friends, now its like hi, bye. Anyways then his friend walks in, his name is Daniel, he and i hit it off real fast. he walked in, his shirt was off then we hit the dance floor, had a drink and hung out all night. I ran into Stephen and elliet and met stephens mom and like i told him i really loved her she was amazing. As the night was coming to an end we had cake to celebrate D's birthday and she had so much fun (in more ways then one lol). It was a night i really needed just to distract myself from everything else thats going through my head. NOW ENJOY THE PICS!

LOVE ISNT REAL, ITS A FANTISY

2010-04-17T23:35:00.000-07:00

This week was hell. Crying all week because of a guy but for the first time in my life i was honest with a guy and how i felt about him. I posted a comment on his FACEBOOK telling him i can't be his friend anymore. Then he, of course wanted to know what that was all about but i tryed to play it off because at the same time I still want him in my life. We got to talking the next day (monday) and he told me i was acting different and that i was being mean. Which was all true, it was my way of pushing him away, then i just stopped talking to him. Monday night he called me 3 times but i couldn't bring myself to answer, he sent me 2 msgs on FACEBOOOK and i couldnt reply. Tuesday he called me 6 times and still couldn't bring myself to answer because i didnt know what to say to him. He called me 2 more times with jacob's phone but i knew who it was so i dindt answer. Finally i texted him on wed. and he asked me what was wrong and if it was hios fault. I told him it was me, i was stupid. He wanted to know what that mentm, then he asked me if i had a thing for him and i couldn't respond. Thursday, I texted him and told him to check his FACEBOOK, i told him i aswered his question from last night and all the other questions i'v never answered. Here's what i wrote:

FACEBOOK msg to Jonathan:
Ok Jonathan you asked me last night if I have a thing for you. So to answer your question and all other questions IV never answered and to be honest not only to you but to myself, here it is, the whole shabang =)

When we first started hanging out, my intentions were to be your friend that’s it. I never expected anything from you, never wanted anything of you, I didn’t have a hidden agenda, didn’t want to sleep with you, nothing. I truly just wanted your friendship. Then along the way I started having feeling for you and that’s why I stopped hanging out with you. It wasn’t because you don’t have a job or a car or money or whatever else, I don’t care about any of that stuff, and I figured it would just be easier that way. But then I missed hanging out with you and we got to talking again and you asked why we stopped hanging out well now you know. You wanted to start hanging out again so we did and I told myself that I’m only your friend but those feeling were still there and I tried to push them away and ignore them but when id see you with Jacob or anyone else being all touchy and whatever, It, to be honest hurts and piss’s me off, I guess that would be called jealousy too, idk. Don’t get me wrong though I love Jacob, he’s a great guy an awesome friend and I still want to be his friend too.
When I sent you that msg saying that I can’t be your friend anymore, it was because I don’t want to have these feeling for you but I don’t want you out of my life either. Crazy I know. Like I said last night its me and I’m stupid. Well that’s everything, I don’t know what else to tell you. I didn’t want to mess up our friendship but I understand if you don’t want to be friends anymore.

He called me that day but i didn't answer, that night he called again and finally i answered my phone. He asked me how i was and then asked why i never said anything before? then he told me, he still wants to be my friend =(
Since then we have made plans to hang out but he's cancelled and i'v just said no. I'm still sad because i know no one is capable of loving me, i will always be the friend. So my new thing is: "LOVE ISNT REAL, ITS A FANTASY" thats all it will ever be. I'm going to have to learn to live with that.

HE MAKES ME CRAZY!!!!!

2010-03-29T09:24:00.000-07:00

well heres the story, sry ahead of time if it doesnt make sence. awhile back i met this guy, jonathan, great guy, caring, affectionet, great bod has it all right? anyways he and i became bff's but along the way my dumb ass fell for him. then he got a bf which hurt when i found out so i stopped hanging out with him. cant hurt if hes not around right?

so after months of not seeing or hearing from him i go to my friends bday party and he shows up with his bf, but he trys to kiss up on me and be all touchy feely and im not having it. so i push him away and i leave. then about 2 weeks ago for whatever reason he texted me and we started talking that night, he asked why we dont hang out anymore and i didnt really give him an answer. but since that night we've been texting everyday all day long. he and his bf arnt a couple anymore but they're friends and fuck buddys. so this weekend they invited me to go stay with them at there hotel they got in weho at first i was like no, have fun but then 5 min later i called and said im on my way. BIG mistake. i get there and first let me say i having nothing against the other guy, his name is jacob by the way, but the fact that he and jonathan fuck. so anyways im there and my feelings for jonathan havent changed. altho my behaivor with him has. im playful and a bitch with him. its my way of protecting my heart. anyways at one point jonathan and i start wrestling and and all these feelings are there then he goes and takes a shoer and comes out with just a towel and stays like that for a while, i just want to take him right there lol. but jacobs there. finally we leave and jonathan gets a phone call from jimmy his ex and they start yelling so i get mad cuz he doesnt need to b in the picture anymore. so finally by 2 am im done and i get my shit and leave. then i keep thinking of jonathan and jacob together and it pisses me off. but i just cant say no to jonathan. it makes me crazy!!!

SEX, DRUGS, POOLS, JUST A REGULAR WEEKEND FOR ME

2010-03-08T20:36:00.000-08:00

OMG!!! THIS PAST WEEKEND WAS VERY INTERESTING TO SAY THE LEAST. SO FRIDAY NIGHT I GOT OFF WORK, WENT HOME AND GOT READY TO HEAD TO SAN DIEGO TO CHILL WITH SOME FRIENDS. MARK, WHO I'VE KNOWN FOR ABOUT A YEAR BUT NEVER REALLY HUNG OUT WITH HIM. ANTHONY, WHO'S A FRIEND OF MARK'S AND SOMEONE WHO I'VE STARTED TO FALL FOR. AND THEN THERE WAS BRIAN, A FRIEND AND ROOMMATE OF THERE'S. AFTER GETTING TO KNOW HIM, HE'S ACTUALLY A COOL AND FUN GUY.

OK SO I HEAD DOWN TO SAN DIEGO AND GET THERE AROUND 10ISH, AS SOON AS I GET THERE MARK'S ALREADY WAISTED AND STARTS A FIGHT WITH BRIAN. NEXT THING I KNOW MARK IS STORMING OUT OF THE BEDROOM AND PUNCHES TO HOLES IN THE WALL. AT THIS POINT I'M THINKING TO MYSELF, "UM, DO I REALLY WANT TO BE HERE TONIGHT?" SO ANYWYAS, MARK CALMS DOWN AND ANTHONY IS GOING BACK AND FORTH FROM THE BEDROOM, TALKING WITH BRIAN TO OUTSIDE TALKING WITH MARK. WHILE THIS IS GOING ON IM INTHE LIVING ROOM WITH MARC, JASON, MALCOM AND ADRIAN. YEAH THING ARE FEELING AWKWORD AT THIS POINT AND PEOPLE ARNT REALLY SURE WHAT TO DO. FINALLY ANTHONY COMES IN AND I NOTICE TEARS IN HIS EYES AND IM JUST LIKE READY TO GO HOLD HIM BUT AT THE SAME TIME I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. SO HE COME'S IN FROM TALKING TO MARK OUTSIDE AND COMES AND SITS ON MY LAP. AT THAT POINT I PUT MY ARMS AROUND HIM AND ASK HIM IF HE'S OK, HE SAYS YEAH. FINALLY I STEP OUTSIDE TO GET SOME AIR. MARK GOES INSIDE AND ANTHONY COME OUT TO TALK WITH ME TO MAKE SURE IM NOT LEAVING LOL. THEN HE AND I JUST GET TO TALKING ABOUT REALATIONSHIPS AND HIS EX, AND PREETY MUCH WHY WE DO THE THINGS WE DO.

FOR SOME REASON WHEN I'M ALONE WITH ANTHONY I FIND IT EASY TO TALK TO HIM AND I CAN TELL HIM ANYTHING. HE AND I HAVE DONE A LOT OF THE SAME THINGS AND FOR THE SAME REASONS, IN THAT WAY I GUESS WE GET EACH OTHER.

AFTER A GOOD TALK HE WENT BACK IN AND I TOOK A LIL WALK. NEXT THING I KNOW EVERYONE IS GETTING INTO MARC'S CAR TO HEAD TO JONATHAN'S HOUSE. BUT HAVING TO MANY PEOPLE BRIAN COMES AROUND WITH HIS TRUCK AND MARK GRABS MY HAND AND PULLS ME INTO THE TRUCK AND WE HEAD TO JONATHAN'S PLACE. OMG JONATHAN'S HOUSE IS 10,000 ACRES. HUGE MANSION. SO WE GET THERE AND JONATHAN ALREADY HAS SOME GUEST OVER AND THERE ALL IN THE JACUZZI, NAKED. SO EVERYONE DECIDES TO GET IN, EITHER NAKED OR IN THER UNDERWEAR. I CHOSE NOT TO GO IN AT ALL. I KNOW IM A LOSER. HONESTLY I WOULD HAVE GOTTEN IN BUT I SAW HOW THEY WERE COMPARING DICKS AND CHECKING BODY'S OUT AND SO ON, LETS BE REALLY I NO PRIZE WINNER LOL. SO I JUST SAT TO THE SIDE. STILL HAD FUN THOUGH. WE ENDED UP GOING BACK HOME AROUND 530ISH SAT. MORNING. STILL STAYED UP AND WATCHED TV AND THEY SMOKED POT THEN A LIL' AFTER 6 WE ALL FINALLY HIT THE BED.

SAT. MORNING OR RATHER AFTERNOON LOL. WE GOT UP AND CHILLED ALL DAY. THEY ENDED UP GETTING ON ADAM4ADAM.COM AND INVITING SOME GUYS OVER. BY THE TIME NIGHT FALL CAME THINGS WERE GOING GREAT. THEN A GUY NAMED JUSTIN RICHARD LEONARD, CAME OVER AND WAS INVITED BY ANTHONY SO THAT ANTHONY COULD FUCK HIM LATER ON IN THE EVENING. I TRYED BELIEVE ME I TRYED TO LET IT GO AND JUST BE COOL AFTER ALL ANTHONY DOESNT KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT HIM. BUT BY THE TIME WE WERE ALL GANNA HEAD TO THE POOL I WAS FUCKN PISSED. SO THEY LEFT TO THE POOL I GRABBED MY SHIT AND I LEFT. JUST KNOWING THAT, THATS WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN I COULDNT STAY THRE ANYMORE.

JUSTIN RICHARD LEONARD
GUY I HATE!!!

SO ALL AND ALL THIS PAST WEEKEND WAS SO MANY THINGS, BUT DEFFINETLY A GOOD ONE.

2 WEEKS NOTICE

2010-03-01T20:48:00.000-08:00

SO TODAY I FINALLY TURNED IN MY 2 WEEKS NOTICE. BASICALLY THE REASON FOR IT, IS BEACUSE I FEEL LIKE THEY WANT ME TO BE SOMEONE IM NOT. I WEAR A BRACELET AND THEY TELL ME TO TAKE IT OFF IT'S INAPPROPRIATE JUST BECAUSE ITS RAINBOW COLORED. I ASK TO DYE MY HAIR BLONDE AND I'M TOLD IT'S INAPPROPRIATE AND IT WOULD DISTURB THE COMMUNITY. YET ONE EMPLOYEE HAS RED HAIR ON TOP AND BLONDE UNDERNEATH. ANOTHER HAS BLONDE STREEKS AND SO ON. PLUS FINACUALLY I CAN'T EVEN AFFORD TO PAY MY BILLS ANYMORE WITH THE MONEY IM MAKE THERE. I HOPING TO FIND A BETTER JOB, EVEN IF I MAKE THE SAME AMOUNT AT LEAST I'LL BE WORKING 40 HRS A WEEK.

LIFE'S GOOD

2010-03-01T09:53:00.000-08:00

SO DRAMA IS STILL GOING ON BUT I'M NOT LETTING IT GT TO ME ANYMORE. THIS PAST WEEKEND WAS, WOW! LOL . I WENT TO DANIELLE'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT HER PLACE, IT HAD A PJ THEME. WELL GUESS WHO SHOWS UP? JONATHAN WITH HIS BOYFRIEND JACOB. HE WALKS IN FINDS ME AND COME'S AND GIVES ME A HUGE HUG AND TRY'S TO BE ALL FRIENDLY BUT IM LIKE BEING REALLY COLD TOWARDS HIM AND HIS BF. JONATHAN ASK'S ME IF IM MAD AT HIM, I JUST TOLD HIM NO AND IGNORED HIM THE REST OF THE NIGHT. JONATHAN ON THE OTHER HAND DIDNT TAKE THE HINT AND TRYED KISSING ME, SAT ON ME AND GRINDED. THEN AT ONE POINT HE CAME AND LIFTED UP HIS SHIRT AND WAS ALL UP ON ME, I WAS NOT HAVING THIS, I PUSHED HIS ASS OFF ME ALL NIGHT. BUT INSIDE IT WAS KILLING ME BECAUSE TO BE HONEST I SO WANT HIM LOL. I DECIDE TO LEAVE THE PARTY CLOSE TO 1AM AND WOW THE THINGS THAT WENT ON AFTE I LEFT. DAVID AND JJ ARE IN ONE OF THE BEDROOMS. DAVID IS TRYN TO GET HIS SARONG BACK FROM JJ SO HE CAN LEAVE BECAUSE JJ BORROWD IT. IN COMES JONATHAN SEE'S JJ NAKED AND STARTS TO PLAY WITH HIS DICK, WHICH IS HUGE. THEN IN COME'S JACOB "THE BF" AND DAVID IS LIKE OMG THERE'S GANNA BE A FIGHT. NOPE, JACOB JOINS IN AND DAVID IS LIKE LET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE. SO JJ, JONATHAN AND JACOB START SUCKING EACH OTHER'S DICKS AND WELL YOU CAN USE YOUR IMAGINATION FOR THE REST.

COME SUNDAY DAVID AND I END UP HANGING OUT AND GO TO CLUB VLVT IN SANTA ANA. THE CLUBS OK BUTIT WAS LADY'S NIGHT AND SO NOT MY THING LOL. DAVID AND I HAD A REALLY GOOD TALK IN THE CAR ON THE WAY HOME. DEFFINETLY HAVE A LOT IN COMMON. HE OPENED UP TO ME AND TOLD ME A LOT ABOUT HIMSELF THAT HE HASNT REALLY TOLD MANY PEOPLE. YOUR AWSOME DAVID.

SO BACK TO SAT. NIGHT AT DANIELLE'S PARTY. I MET THIS GUY A WHILE BACK NAMED ANTHONY, HE LIVES IN SAN DIEGO, HE'S TALL, NICE TAN VERY HANDSOME, SWEAT, GREAT DANCER, FUN TO BE AROUND, DIFFERENT FROM ALL HIS FRIENDS, LONG BROWN HAIR, BEAUTIFUL GREEN EYES, A SMILE THATS TO CUTE FOR WORDS, GREAT BODY, SMART, FUNNY, AWSOME TASTE IN MUSIC..... ANYWAYS LOL, AS YOU CAN TELL IM VERY FOND OF ANTHONY, WELL I INVITED HIM TO THE PARTY AND THAT DAY HE STILL SAID HE WAS COMING BUT IN THE END HE NEVER SHOWED. I WASNT MAD BUT I WAS HURT. I FELT LET DOWN AND DISAPPOINTED. I KNEW IN MY HEART ALL DAY THAT HE WASNT GOING TO GO, I JUST FELT IT. AT THE SAME TIME THERE WAS A VERY SMALL PART OF ME THAT SAID JUST MAYBE HE'LL SURPRISE ME AND HE'LL SHOW UP. I THINK THATS WHY IT HURT SO MUCH WHEN HE DIDNT, BECAUSE I ACTUALLY WANTED HIM TO BE THERE. THAT NIGHT I SENT HIM A TEXT WITH "=(" THATS ALL I PUT. THE NEXT MORNING (SUNDAY), HE SENT ME A TEXT SAYING, "I'M SRRY BABY" FOLLOWED BY "MY GRANDPA WAS IN THE HOSPITAL" I ASKED HIM IF HE GRANDPA WAS OK, HE SAID YES, MUCH BETTER. NOW WEATHER ITS TRUE OR NOT ABOUT HIS GRANDPA AND I KNOW THIS SOUNDS SELFISH BUT IM STILL HURT ABOUT THE WHOLE THING. ANYWAYS THAT ALL I GOTS TO SAY FOR THE MOMENT. I'M GANNA TRY AND GET BACK TO BLOGGING MORE.

ANTHANY

DOING WHAT I LOVE TO DO

2010-02-01T09:51:00.000-08:00

I HAD A REALLY RELAXING WEEKEND. ON SAT. I WENT AND PICKED UP MY DIST FROM A PHOTOGRAPHER I WORKED WITH AND THEN JUST SPENT THE WEEKEND WITH MY NEPHEW. SAW THE GRAMMY'S. GAGA'S PERFORMANCE WAS GREAT, THE MJ TRIBUTE WAS GREAT, LOVED THE SONG. DIDNT FINISH WATCHING THE GRAMMY'S, KINDA GOT BORED. ANYWYS HERE ARE TWO OF MY FAVORITE PICS.

DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA

2010-01-19T19:59:00.000-08:00

SO YESTERDAY I WENT OUT WITH A FRIEND, WHILE WE WERE OUT HE TELLS ME THAT HE WAS ON THE PHONE FOR SUCH A LONG TIME LAST NIGHT WITH JASON (EX FRIEND). BEFORE I CONTINUE, I'LL SAY IT NOW. YES THE FRIEND I WENT OUT WITH IS SOMEONE WHO IM STARTING TO LIKE MORE THAN JUST A FRIEND.

HERE'S WHY:
HE'S FUNNY, I LOVE THE WAY HE KNOWS EVERY SONG OUT THERE. HE'S CUTE, HE'S SMART, I LOVE THAT HE'S GOING BACK TO SCHOOL AND WILL BE STUDING FILM OF ALL THINGS. NOW HE'S NOT THE GREATEST BUT I LOVE THE WAY HE SINGS. =) I LOVE THE FACT THAT HE LOVES OLD CLASSIC MOVIES. MOSTLY I LOVE THE WAY HE CUDDLES UP IN MY ARMS, THE WAY HE PUTS HIS ARMS AROUND ME WHEN WE'RE OUT AT THE CLUBS AND THE WAY HE HOLDS MY HAND WHEN WE'RE WATCHING A MOVIE.

JONATHAN

BUT I KNOW TO HIM IM JUST A FRIEND, IM ALWAYS JUST A FRIEND.

ANYWAYS AS HE AND JASON TALKED, I WAS PART OF THEIR CONVERSATION. YES, THEY SAID GREAT THINGS ABOUT ME (THANK YOU) BUT I DIDNT LIKE THE FACT THAT JASON HAD TOLD HIM THAT HE THOUGHT THAT I AND JONATHAN MIGHT BE SOMETHING. HE TOLD HIM SOME THINGS THAT WERNT SUPPOSED TO BE TOLD TO HIM. THEN THEY DECIDED THAT IM THE PERFECT BOYFRIEND (AGAIN THANK YOU) BUT PEOPLE ARE SHALLOW. WHEN HE TOLD ME THAT IT HURT, IT WAS HARD TO FIGHT BACK THE TEARS BUT I DID AND ITS THE TRUTH. JONATHAN, AFTER TELLING ME ALL THIS ASKED ME IF I HATTED HIM NOW, LOL THE ANSWER IS NO. THAT WHOLE CONVERSATION WAS IN MY HEAD THE REST OF THE NIGHT AND I THINK JONATHAN KNEW THAT BECAUSE HE TOLD ME TO STOP THINKING WHILE WE WERE WATCHING THE MOVIE LOL.

JASON (EX FRIEND)

I'M MAD AT JASON BEACUSE HE SHOULDNT HAVE SAID ANYTHING ABOUT HOW I FEEL TOWARDS JONATHAN AND YES I AM KINDA JELIOUSE AND UPSET THAT JASON CALLED JONATHAN AND TALKED FOR HRS KNOWING HOW I FEEL ABOUT HIM.

DAVID (EX FRIEND)

I'M MORE MAD AND HURT WITH DAVID (EX FRIEND) BECAUSE IF YOU KNOW ME I'M NOT MUCH OF A TALKER. I'M QUIET, I KEEP THINGS TO MYSELF (ALOT) BUT FOR WHATEVER REASON ONE NIGHT DAVID ASKED ME WHATS WRONG AND FOR ONCE I THOUGHT MAYBE HE IS A FRIEND THAT I COULD TRUST, A FRIEND I COULD TALK TO. SO I DID AND HE TURNS AROUND AND TELLS JASON WHO THEN TALKS TO JONATHAN . WELL LIKE I TOLD DAVID IN A TEXT, "THATS WHY I DON'T TALK TO ANYONE AND I WONT AGAIN." DAVID TEXTED BACK THAT HE'S SORRY AND DIDN'T MEAN TO BETRAY MY TRUST AND THAT HE FELT HORRIBLE ABOUT IT. MY TEXT TO HIM WAS, "DONT." I KNOW YOU DIDNT MEAN TO BETRAY ME, HURT ME, WHATEVER AND DONT FEEL HORRIBLE I WAS THE STUPID ONE FOR TRUSTING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE, BELIEVE ME IT WONT HAPPEN AGAIN. NOT WITH YOU OR ANYONE ELSE.

NOT TO MUCH TO SAY

2009-12-22T21:13:00.000-08:00

WOW IT HAS BEEN WAY TO LONG SINCE I'VE LAST POSTED A BLOG. I'M NOT EVEN SURE WHERE TO EVEN START THIS ONE. WELL TO BE HONEST, NOT MUCH HAS CHANGED IN MY LIFE. STILL GOING OUT, ALTHOUGH NOT AS MUCH, I'M TRYING TO GET BACK ON TRACK WITH PAYING BILLS.
STILL SINGLE AND ALONE, OF COURSE I DON'T THINK THAT WILL EVER CHANGE. THIAGO HAS A BOYFRIEND AND IS BACK HOME IN BRAZIL FOR THE HOLIDAYS. HE'LL BE BACK IN JAN. JOSHUA KEPKE, A FRIEND THAT I NEVER PLANNED ON FALLING FOR NOW HAS A BOYFIEND OF HIS OWN AS WELL. THEY SEEM TO BE HAPPY AND LIKE ALL FRIENDS THAT GET IN A RELATIONSHIP, YOU JUST SEEM TO LOOSE CONTACT WITH THEM.
ANYWAYS ITS ALMOST THE NEW YEAR. IN 2009 I BEGAN TO BUILD A NAME FOR MYSELF, "COCO" AND I'VE DONE THAT, NOW MY GOAL FOR 2010 IS TO PUT AN IMAGE TO THAT NAME. NOT JUST A FACE BUT A BODY AS WELL. BY THAT I MEAN I'M GOING TO WORK MY ASS OFF TO LOOSE WEIGHT AND I'M GOING TO NEED ALL THE MOTIVATION I CAN GET.
WELL THATS ALL THATS ON MY MIND AT THE MOMENT SO TILL NEXT TIME.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSHUA MILLER!!!!

2009-11-07T14:15:00.000-08:00

OCT. 28TH WAS MY FRIEND JOSHUA MILLERS BDAY. NOW US GAYS KNOW HOW TO CELEBRATE AND WE DONT JUST PARTY FOR ONE NIGHT, LOL. THAT BEING SAID HE HAD A 3 NIGHT BDAY PARTY. I ONLY MADE IT TO ONE CUZ I AINT THAT RICH BITCH LOL. SO WE WENT TO RAGE AND SAW THE DRAG SHOW IT WAS THE HALLOWEEN SHOW AND OMG IT WAS AMAZING.

JOSHUA MILLER, YOU ARE ONE OF THE GREATEST GUYS I HAVE EVER MET. WE BECAME FRIENDS ALMOST 8 YEARS AGO AFTER MEETING ON MYSPACE, LOL. WE TALKED ALMOST EVERY NIGHT, JUST ABOUT EVERTHING, OUR DAY AND ALL THE STUPID SHIT AND THE FUN TIMES. THEN FOR A WHILE AS WE GREW WE LAST CONTACT. BACK THEN I NEVER WENT OUT, NEVER BEEN TO A CLUB AND I WAS LOST. IT WAS ONLY TILL RECENTLY WE ACUALLY HAD THE CHANCE TO MEET IN PERSON. WE FIRST MET AT TIGERHEAT, YOU STOOD NEXT TO ME AND I SAW YOU AND KNEW EXACTLY WHO YOU WERE. I SAID HI AND AT THAT MOMENT YOU KNEW WHO I WAS AND WE'VE BEEN CLOSER FRIENDS EVER SINCE. JOSH, I LOVE YOU FOR BEING YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE.

HALLOWEEN TIME!!!

2009-11-07T13:30:00.000-08:00

THIS YEAR I ACTUALLY DID SOMETHING FOR HALLOWEEN. IM SO PROUD OF MYSELF LOL. OK SO THIS YEAR I FIRST WENT TO MY FRIENDS HALLOWEEN PARTY. IT WAS FUN I ENDED UP MEETING 3 GUYS. KYLE WAS THE ONE I WAS REALLY INTERESTED IN THOUGH. BUT AS ALWAYS NOTHING HAPPEND AFTER ALL IM ALWAYS THE FRIEND. OK MOVING ON, SO THEN I WENT TO CLUB LUCKY AT HOUSE OF BLUES. WHERE I SPENT ALMOST THE WHOLE NIGHT WITH JOSH, WHOM I LOVE. THEN I WAS DITCHED BY EVERYONE AND LEFT ALONE THE LAST HOUR OR 2 BEFORE IT CLOSED SO WHATEVER LOL.

ON OCT. 31ST MY FRIEND BASTIAN AND I WENT TO WEHO TO CELEBRATE HALLOWEEN. OMG I EXPECTED TO HAVE SO MUCH FUN AND THAT IT WAS GOING TO BE CRAZY. LETS JUST SAY NEXT YEAR WILL BE FUNNER. I HOPE, LOL. OK I THINK WHAT IT WAS IS I JUST NEEDED TO KNOW WHERE TO BE, WHERE ALL THE HOT SPOTS ARE YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? SO ANYWAYS BASTIAN WAS GOING TO BE A NURSE BUT BY THE TIME WE GOT THERE HE LOST HIS SHIRT AND BECAME AN EXSCAPED PATIENT BUT BY THE TIME WE GOT FROM THE CAR TO THE PARTY HE HAD LOST HIS PANTS AND WE WERNT SURE WHAT TO CALL HIM. LATER AS WE WALKED AROUND PEOPLE WERE ALLING HIM THE SWINFLU SO THAT WORKED LOL. WE LATER RAN INTO FRIENDS OF MINE LIKE PHILLIP ASHTON AND JASHUA MILLER , FUCK I LOVE THEM ALL. SO HERE ARE THE REST OF THE PICS FROM HALLOWEEN 2009. NEXT YEAR WILL BE A HELL OF A LOT BETTER LOL.

I JUST DONT GIVE A FUCK

2009-11-07T13:11:00.000-08:00

DAMN I HAVEN'T BEEN ON HERE IN FOREVER. WELL LETS STAR WITH AN UPDATE FROM MY LAST BLOG. IN SHORT I'M DOING JUST FINE. I STILL HAVE A ROOF OVER MY HEAD AND HE HASNT SAID A THING TO ME AND WHY? BECAUSE HE KNOWS BETTER, LOL.

OK NOW ONTO BETTER DAYS. SO LET ME THINK WHAT HAVE I DONE SINCE MY LAST BLOG. UMMMM....... O YEAH! I ALMOST GOT FIRED FROM WORK LOL. OK HERE'S WHAT HAPPEND. ONE NIGHT I WAS CLOSING AND THERE WERE ABOUT 5 KIDS IN THE ROOM. I WAS VACUUMING AND ONE KID WENT TO MY BACKSIDE AND JUMPED ON MY BACK BECAUSE HE JUST WANTED TO PLAY (RUFFHOUSE A LIL'). ANYWAYS SO I GIVE IN AND I PRETEND TO BIGHT HIM, TO GET HIM OFF. THEN HIS SISTER JOINS IN AND I PRETEND TO SLAP HER. NOW KEEP IN MIND IM NOT ACTUALLY HURTING THEM. SO FINALLY THEIR MOM COMES TO PICK THEM UP AND I TELL HER EVERYTHING THAT HAPPEND. SHE'S ALL O! OK HOW FUN. SHE LAUGHS A LIL' AND SO ON. WE BOTH WALK TO OUR CARS, I LEAVE AND SHE GOES BACK TO THE ROOM AND TELLS THE DIRECTOR EVERYTHING THAT HAPPEND. AS SHE'S TELLING HER SHE'S SAYING I SLAPPED HER KIDS AND BIT THEM AND THE WAY SHE SAYING IT DOESNT SOUND GOOD AT ALL. SO THE DIRECTOR TALKS TO ME AND SHE KNOWS HOW I EM SO SHE KNOWS I DIDNT DO ANYTHING WRONG. BUT SHE HAS TO TELL HER BOSS AND SEE WHAT HAPPENDS. LATER I FIND OUT THAT WHEN MY DIRECTOR WAS TALKING TO THE MOM SHE ALSO MENTIONED THAT I COULD HAVE DISEASES AND THAT THE DAD THOUGHT I WAS WEIRD TO BEGIN WITH AND I WAS LIKE FUCK THEM.

UPDATE
WELL I STILL HAVE MY JOB AND I MAKE SURE THAT THE PARENTS KNOW IM NOT VERY FOND OF THEM. THE KIDS ON THE OTHER HAND IM ICE TO AFTER ALL ITS NOT THEIR FAULT. MY DIRECTOR DID TELL ME THOUGH THAT SHE WOULD HAVE TO WRITE ME UP BUT IT STILL HASNT BEEN DONE. AND MAYBE ITS NOT REALLY GOOD TO SAY BUT HONESTLY I JUST DONT GIVE A FUCK ANYMORE. :)

LETS GET PERSONAL

2009-10-15T20:39:00.000-07:00

ok lets talk about my personal life. so i come home today and frank (dad, not by choice) is home from mexico. before he left he ordered direct tv had it installed in the livingroom, moms bedroom, carlos' room, and the back house where my grandpa lives and nothing in my room but im like whatever, dont care. then frank tells my grandpa he has to pay $20 for it so my grandpa says no. frank takes it out of his home and brings it to me and installs it in my room. a couple of days later he tells me he wants to be connected to the internet which i have in my room and my room only. so im nice and tell him i'll look into it and see how much it would cost and what not. by morning he had left to mexico this was on a sat. i call my internet service but cant really get all the info i need till mon. when there open. so i call tues. cuz mon i sleep from being out all night on sunday. anyways they tell me i can have the internet through out the whole house but id hve to cancel what i have and put in fios which would be about $199 to do. no not ganna happen so i ask about getting another modem that would cost as well which i figured im not stupid. but im not going to pay more than what im already paying cuz i just cant afford it and i dont trust frank to pay me the difference evey month. so today i come home and he's back from mexico as i said and asked me about the internet again so i explain to him the whole thing and he just doesnt understand why i wont add him on to my service. so after about an hr of going back and forth he tells me what if i cancel mine and he gets the interent and adds me to his. so i say fine but what if you stop paying the bill or u cant afford it anymore; o did i mention he doesnt work, he's a drugy and yeah some how he's going to have the money for all this. so he tells me well if that happens i just order my own internet again. which means more money out of my pocket because it would have to be a whole new contract and what not. so i tell him that straight out i dont trust you to make the payments and i dont want to be fucked over. so he asked me if i think its fair that he's paying for me to have direct tv and i cant give him internet. fair question, right? well here's why we have direct tv now. we went from time warner cable which my mom was paying for to direct tv because frank ran the bill from about $60 a month to over $200 a month because he just loves to order porn. now my mom payed what she could but eventually stopped because she couldnt afford it anymore, can you blame her? after all every month adds up. so i tell him well i can give you the box for direct tv back. so he says, you want to do that and i say if thats what you want. then he says i already told you what i want! and i turn and look him straight in the eyes and tell him i feel more comfortable with my own thing the way it is because i just dont trust you. so he says ok ill get the box in the morning. i say, ill have it for you as soon as i get out of the shower tonight.

i dont do bribes or threats or anything else, not from him or anybody for that matter. i dont trust him, i dont like him, i dont love him , he's not a father, he's not a husband, he's not a provider, he's not good man or a man for that matter. but i will tell what he is, he's a woman beater, an alcoholic, a drugy, a person who walks out on his family, a low life who cant even make it on his own he had to come back because he lost his apartment, his car and his second family he left to take care of. he's a sick and perverted person and a waist of air and space ion this world. dont get me wrong i dont hate him, i just dont care. he doesnt exist to me.

update...
I JUST FOUND OUT THAT AFTER OUR LIL CONVERSATION HE'S TAKING THE BOX OUT OF MY MOMS ROOM TOO AND WHY BECAUSE SHOCKER, HE CANCELED IT. WHICH THERES A FEE OF $400 TO DO SO AND IM SURE HE'S NOT GOING TO PAY.

MY MOM PAYS FOR CABLE AND EVERYONE IN THE HOUSE CAN WATCH IT BUT NOW FRANK HAS DIRECT TV AND NO ONE CAN WATCH IT IN LESS HE GETS SOMETHING. UM YEAH TOTALLY FAIR. MY MOM TOLD HIM THAT. THAT IS WHY HIS KIDS DONT LIKE HIM CARE FOR HIM OR ANYTHING ELSE. HE DOES THINGS FOR EVERYONE ELSE BUT FUCKS HIS FAMILY TO DO IT. O WELL RIGHT?

DONT GET ME WRONG IM NOT HURT OR UPSET I JUST HAVE ALL THESE THOUGHTS RUNNING THROUGH MY HEAD AND TIRED OF HOLDING THEM IN. IV DONE IT MY WHOLE LIFE, JUST BOTTLED EVERYTHING UP, WELL NO MORE.

SUTRA

2009-10-13T09:34:00.000-07:00

SUNDAY NIGHT WAS AMAZING! OK SO LUCKY SUNDAYS MOVED TO ITS NEW LOCATION AT SUTRA IN COSTA MESA. EVERYTHING STARTS AN HOUR EARLIER THEN BEFORE. I OF COURSE GOT THERE AROUND 930PM WHEN I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THERE AT 9 THE LATEST, LOL O WELL. SO I GET THERE AND IM IN LINE, YEAH CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? I HAD TO WAIT IN LINE. ANYWAYS SO IM IN LINE AND I SEE THAT THE SHOW WAS STARTING SO IT WASNT BAD THAT I WAS LATE. I WALK IN AND OMG IT IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND A DEFINET UPGRADE FROM TIA JUANA'S LET ME TELL YOU. THERE'S A HUGE DISCO BALL IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DANCE FLOOR, AN ACTUAL STAGE, SEATING AREA TO THE RIGHT OF THE STAGE AND TO THE LEFT, SEATING AREA WITH BOOTHS AND SOFA JUST BEHIND THE DANCE FLOOR, O AND ALL THE DECORE IS WHITE, OMG JUST AMAZING. PLUS THEY HAVE LASERS AND SCREENS EVERYWHERE. THE PLACE IS HUGE BECAUSE THAT WAS JUST THE FIRST ROOM. ON TO THE PEOPLE, FIRST OFF THERE WERE LOTS OF NEW FACES THERE OR AS I LIKE TO CALL THEM, "NEW TOYS." LOL JUST KIDDING (NOT). ALSO KAIYA JONES OF THE PUSSYCAT DOLLS PERFORMED AND AFTER WORD THOSE WITH A SPECIAL TICKET WERE ALLOWD TO GO MEET AND GREET WITH HER AND I NOT HAVING A SPECIAL TICKET, WELL LETS JUST SAY I DONT NEED ONE LOL. KAIYA IS AWSOME SO FUNNY AND SWEET. THEN, GUESS WHO WAS THERE? THE ONLY ONE THAT MMATTERS TO ME (SMILE), THIAGO!!! YOU KNOW I LOVE HIM. HERE'S THE THING, LAST NIGHT FOR THE FIRST TIME I FOUND MYSELF NOT ATTRACTED TO HIM ANYMORE. I SAW HIM AS A FRIEND AND THATS A GOOD THING, FOR NOW ANYWAYS. ALSO WHO SHOWED UP WAS, BRUNO, BASTION, JASON, ANAID, ANTHONY, LEXI AND SO MANY OTHERS. SPENT THE WHOLE NIGHT DANCING WITH JASON.

KINGDOM

2009-10-06T21:29:00.000-07:00

LAST WEEKEND WAS GAY DAYS. WHICH MEANS THE GAYS GO TO DISNEYLAND ALL THREE DAYS PLUS THERE ARE CONCERTS AND CLUBS IN DOWNTOWN DISNEY AND WITHIN DISNEYLAND. WELL IT TURNS OUT I GOT SICK ON THURS. AND FRI. BUT STARTED FEELING BETTER BY SAT. THE ONLY THING IS, IM A BROKE BITCH LOL. SO HOPEFULLY NEXT I'LL BE ABLE TO GO TO GAY DAYS WITH MY FRIENDS. ALTHOUGH I DID WIN A TICKET TO KINGDOM, A CLUB AT HOUSE OF BLUES ANAHEIM WITH PERFORMANCES BY EDEN ESPANOSA AND STACEY Q. I WAS REALLY HESITANT TO GO ONLY BECAUSE I HAD NO MONEY AND I DIDNT KNOW ANYBODY THAT WOULD BE THERE. I EVEN STARTED GIVING MY TICKET AWAY ON FACEBOOK AND MYSPACE BUT NO ONE REALLY WANTED IT. SO AT THE LAST MINUTE I DECIDED TO GO AND I ENDED UP RUNNING INTO MORGAN THEN BLITZ AND A FEW OTHERS BUT WE DIDNT REALLY HANG OUT. WE ONLY SAID HELLO'S, ANYWAYS I WENT TO THE STAGE WHERE YOU CAN ALWAYS FIND ME AND DANCED THE WHOLE NIGHT THERE. EDEN PERFORMED A FEW SONGS FROM WHEN SHE USED TO SING AT DISNEYLAND THEN PERFORMED HER FAMOUS SONG GRAVITY FROM THE MUSICAL WICKED. IT WAS AMAZING. LATER THAT NIGHT STACEY Q CAME OUT TO CLOSE THE SHOW WITH 3 PERFORMANCES. NOT A GREAT NIGHT BUT IT WAS OK. NOT MUCH ELSE TO SAY LOL.

LAST BASH

2009-10-06T20:51:00.000-07:00

SUNDAY NIGHT I WENT OUT TO LUCKY SUNDAY'S FOR IT LAST BASH AT TIA JUANA'S AS IT WILL BE MOVING TO COSTA MESA'S SUTRA LOUNGE, THAT SHOULD BE FUN. ANYWAYS IT TURNED OUT TO BE A FUN NIGHT. HECTOR, KYLE AND I GOT INTO A CONVERSATION AND SOMEHOW ROBERTS SEX LIFE BECAME THE TOPIC OF THE NIGHT AND ROBERT WASNT EVEN THERE LOL. ROBERT AND KYLE HOOKED UP MORE THAN ONCE, WHICH I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY ABOUT THAT, HONESTLY I KIND OF SEE ROBERT DIFFERENTLY NOW THAT I'V HEARD THAT. ALSO THAT NIGHT I SAW THIS REALLY CUTE GUY THAT I REALLY FOUND ATTRACTIVE. MY FRIEND DANIELLE KNOWS HIM AND TELL'S ME HIS NAME IS JAY JAY, AND THAT HE USED TO BE A MODEL FOR ABERCROMBIE & FITCH. HE STOPPED MODELING BECAUSE IN THE MODEL WORLD HE BECAME TO FAT BUT BELIEVE ME HE IS SO NOT FAT AND IN MY OPINION HE IS DAMN FINE. SO WE GOT TO TALKING AND ALREADY ON THE SUBJECT OF DICK SIZES I FIGURED I MIGHT AS WELL FLIRT A LIL' LOL. SO MY FRIEND SAY'S SHE DOESNT FUCK ANYONE SMALLER THAN A 6IN. SO I TURN TO JAY JAY AND I ASK HIM WHAT ARE HIS THOUGHT ON SIZE AND HE TELLS ME THAT EVERYONE HE'S EVER BEEN WITH WAS 6 OR SMALLER BECAUSE THATS HOW HE LIKES THEM. MOSTLY BECAUSE HE'S A TOP BUT LIKES IT IN THE ASS FROM TIME TO TIME. THAT I FOUND TO BE A TURN ON, SO WE CONTINUED TO TALK AND EVEN DANCED A LIL' BUT AT THE END OF THE NIGHT I NEVER REALLY MADE A MOVE ON HIM BECAUSE IM NOT LOOKING FOR A ONE NIGHT STAND. ITS FUNNY HE THOUGHT THAT HECTOR AND I WERE A COUPLE BUT I SQUASHED THAT REAL FAST SO THAT HE KNEW I WAS SINGLE. LATER THAT NIGHT I WAS CHIT CHATTEN WITH MY FRIENDS AND ALL OF A SUDDEN I HEAR, "COCO!!!" RIGHT BEHIND ME AND I'M LIKE UM OK SO I TURN AND IST ADRENALINE STANDING RIGHT BEHIND ME AND SHE SAY'S, "YOU OWE ME." SO IM LIKE WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, RIGHT? SO SHE TELLS ME I WON, I WON A CD SINGLE BY MARIAH AND A POSTER. ON THE NORM SHE JUST GIVES THEM AWAY TO THE NEXT PERSON IF THE ONE THAT WON DOESNT CLAM THEIR PRIZE BUT SHE WAS LIKE, "COCO? I KNOW THIS BITCH." LOL SHE'S AWSOME I LOVE HER. THANKS HUN, I OWE YOU BIG TIME. THEN AS I WAS ABOUT TO LEAVE THESE LADIES ARE WALKING OUT, THEIR A LIL' OLDER AND ONE IS SHORTER THAN I EM' AND THEY NOTICE I HAD WON AND I COULD TELL THEY WOULD HAVE LIKED TO HAVE WON SO THEY COULD HACVE GIVEN IT TO ALEX, WHO WAS EITHER A FRIEND OR THEIR SON. ANYWAYS I ASKED THEM IF THEY WOULD LIKE TO HAVE MY PRIZE AND SO I GAVE IT TO THEM AND THEY WERE SO HAPPY. THAT PRETTY MUCH ENDED THE NIGHT SO ENJOY THE PICS.

ICED

2009-10-02T16:11:00.000-07:00

SO THE OTHER DAY I WAS HOME, JUST GOTN UP AND FINISHED CLEANING MY ROOM. I LOOKED AT MY MAKE-UP AND WAS KINDA BORED. SO WHAT DO YOU THINK I DID? LOL THATS RIGHT I STARTED PLAYING AROUND AND IN THE END IT LOOKED GREAT. ALTHOUGH IT STILL NEEDS SOME WORK, JUST MINER DETAILS. WELL HERE IT IS, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

POOL PARTY

2009-09-27T08:12:00.000-07:00

OK SO YESTERDAY WAS MY FRIEND CHRISTINA'S BDAY PARTY, WHICH WAS A POOL PARTY, FUN RIGHT? NOT. SO I GET THERE AND FIRST THERE ARE KIDS EVERYWHERE AND IM SORRY AFTER WORKING ALL WEEK WITH KIDS NOT REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO A PARTY WITH KIDS, DONT GET ME WRONG THOUGH I DO LOVE THEM. THEN I SEE ALYEUS THERE AND THATS COOL WHATEVER ALL I KNEW IS THAT I WANTED TO SUCK HIS DICK AND HAVE SEX WITH HIM , THATS IT, JUST A ONE NIGHT THING. SO I STARTED DRINKING SO THAT HOPEFULLY IT WOULD LIGHTEN ME UP AND I'D BE A LITTLE MORE SOCIAL AND FRIENDLY BUT NO IT DIDN'T. SEE HERE'S THE THING CHRISTINA AND HER FAMILY AND ALL THE THOSE FRIENDS, THEY ARE APART OF ALEX'S LIFE, WHICH IS A LIFETIME AGO. THEY ALL SEE ME AND THINK OF ME FROM WHEN THEY KNEW ME BUT THATS NOT WHO I EM ANYMORE. ALEX DIED A LONG TIME AGO AND COCO CAME TO LIFE, THATS WHO I EM NOW AND I DONT MEAN TO BE AN ASS OR STUCK-UP OR WHATEVER ELSE, THEY JUST DON'T GET ME ANYMORE, THERE'S NO CONNECTION OTHER THEN THE PAST. DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? ANYWAYS AFTER THE ALCOHOL WORE OFF ALYEUS JUST BECAME ANNOYING TO ME AND I TRIED TO MINGLE BUT IT JUST WASN'T GOING TO HAPPEN. SO I SAID MY GOODBYE'S AND LEFT. LETS SEE WHAT TODAY HAS IN STORE FOR ME.

STACEY Q

2009-09-27T07:52:00.000-07:00

i WENT OUT WED. NIGHT TO THE ONE NIGHT RETURN OF CLUB THRUST. STACEY Q (80'S POP SINGER, "2 OF HEARTS") WAS PERFORMING AND OMG SHE WAS AMAZING. AFTER HER PERFORMANCE I WENT TO THE VIP AREA WITH HER TO HANG OUT AND TALK FOR A WHILE. I GOT HER AUTOGRAPH AND A FEW PICS, THATS ABOUT IT. THAT NIGHT I ALSO WON A TICKET TO GO TO THE OPENING NIGHT CONCERT FOR GAY DAYS. NOT SURE IF I'M GOING YET WE'LL HAVE TO WAIT AND SEE. AND AS ALWAYS HERE ARE THE PICS.

YOU GOT TO SHOW ME LOVE

2009-09-22T20:50:00.000-07:00

SO I WENT SHOPPING WITH MY NEPHEW TO GO BUY SOME FISHNET STALKNS AND WHITE MAKE-UP POWDER FOR HALLOWEEN AND WHILE I WAS THERE I WAS THIS WIG AND WAS LIKE I HAVE TO GET IT AND JUST SEE WHAT I WOULD LOOK LIKE. SO GOT HOME DID MY MAKE-UP AND SPORTED THE WIG AND BOOM THIS WAS THE END RESULT, LOL. WHAT DO YOU THINK, YOU LIKE OR NO LIKE?
ITS CUTE MY NEPHEW WANTS TO BE THE BOOGIE MAN FROM THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS. SO IM HELPING HIM MAKE HIS COSTUME AND I MEAN MAKING IT FROM SCRATCH SO WHISH US LUCK LOL. ALRIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT I WILL BE HEADING TO CLUB THRUST AS IT WILL BE RETURNING FOR ONLY ONE NIGHT WITH A PERFORMANCE BY STACEY Q. YEAH I WASN'T SURE WHO SHE WAS AT FIRST EITHER, LOL. SHE SANG THE 80'S HIT SONG TWO OF HEARTS.WITH MY CONNECTIONS I GOT SOME FREE VIP PASSES THAT WILL ALLOW ME TO DO A MEET AND GREET WITH HER. AWSOME! OK SO THAT BLOG WILL BE UP SOMETIME THIS WEEK, I HOPE. GOODNIGHT EVERYONE.

DOWNTOWN

2009-09-22T20:39:00.000-07:00

A FEW WEEKS AGO ON A WED. NIGHT I WENT OUT TO CLUB LUCKY AT HOUSE OF BLUE DOWNTOWN DISNEY AND MET UP WITH A FEW FRIENDS LIKE JASON WHO BROUGHT A COUPLE OF HIS FRIENDS AND JOSH WHO I JUST LOVE, SUCH A LIL CUTIE. ANYWAYS TURNED OUT TO BE A GOOD NIGHT, IN FACT THATS WHEN I TALKED TO THIAGO AND BLAH BLAH BLAH , YOU ALL KNOW. NOT MUCH ELSE TO WRITE ABOUT.

FUN WITH MY NEPHEW

2009-09-22T20:06:00.000-07:00

SO A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO I TOOK MY NEPHEW TO D23 WHICH IS A DISNEY EXPO. THEY HAD A LOT OF DISNEY STUFF THERE OF COURSE BUT THE REASON I TOOK HIM WAS TO MEET THE CAST OF WIZARDS OF WAVERLY PLACE. I GOT TO SAY IT WAS REALLY AWSOME. WE SAW THE FIRST SHOW FOR THE NEW SEASON, ( HAVE NO CLUE WHEN IT STARTS, LOL). TOOK LOTS OF PICS AND AFTER THE WHOLE SESSION OF TALKING WITH THE CAST, HONOR SOCIETY PERFORMED AND DAMN THEY'RE AWSOME. MY NEPHEW REALLY ENJOYED HIMSELF. ON OUR WAY OUT WE RAN INTO CHARACTERS FOR THE NEW MOVIE "ALICE IN WONDERLAND" AND OMG THE GUY DRESSED AS THE WHITE RABBIT WAS SO FUCKING HOT. SO I MUST SAY THAT WAS MY HIGHLIGHT OF THE DAY LOL. HERE THE PICS.

MISSED HIM IN MY LIFE

2009-09-14T09:36:00.000-07:00

OK HERE IS THE UPDATE ABOUT THIAGO. I WENT OUT ON WED. NIGHT TO CLUB LUCKY HOUSE OF BLUES AT DOWNTOWN DISNEY. MET UP WITH JASON, A COUPLE OF HIS FRIENDS, BRANDON AND JOSHUA. IT WAS A FUN NIGHT I DANCED ALL NIGHT AND SHAKED MY ASS. THIAGO WAS THERE DANCING ON STAGE THAT NIGHT BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO SAY HI OR TALK TO HIM. ITS GETNING CLOSE TO 2 AND THE CLUBS GANNA BE CLOSING SOON SO I FIGURE OK I'LL JUST START MAKING MY WAY TO THE EXIT BEFORE IT GETS ALL CROWDED. THEN I SEE THIAGO AND HE SEE'S ME, HE WALKS OVER WITH THIS HUGE SMILE HAS HIS HANDS OUT AND GIVES ME THIS HUGE HUG AND KISS AND I JUST MELT IN HIS ARMS, LOL. WHAT CAN I SAY I LOVE THE GUY AND ITS HELLA HARD TO STAY MAD AT HIM. ALTHOUGH I WAS NEVER MAD JUST KINDA HURT. ANYWAYS WE START TALKING AND HE ASK'S ME WHAT I HAVE BEEN DOING BECAUSE WE HAVEN'T SEEN EACH OTHER FOR 3 WEEKS. I ASK HIM ABOUT VEGAS AND THE WHITE PARTY AND THEN HE TELLS ME HIS SCHEDULE AND INVITES ME TO HERE LOUNGE IN WEHO ON SAT. NIGHT. SO SINCE WED. NIGHT I HAVE BEEN SO HAPPY AND I THINK THATS WHAT MY PROBLEM WAS, I WAS MISSING HIM IN MY LIFE.

SAT, ROLLS AROUND AND MY BOSS/FRIEND AND I HAD MADE PLANS TO GO TO WEHO TO HAVE FUN AND OF COURSE SEE THIAGO BUT IM NOT REALLY IN THE MOOD TO GO SO I CALL MY BOSS/FRIEND AND TELL HER IM BABYSITTING AND CAN'T GO. THAT WAS AROUND 6ISH, 8 O'CLOCK COMES AROUND AND I'M FEELING REAL BAD THT I DID THAT TO HER SO I CALL HER BACK AND TELL HER THAT MY BRO AND SIS CAME HOME EARLY SO IM FREE TO GO IF SHE STILL WANTS TO GO. SHE SAY SHE ALREADY MADE OTHER PLANS WITH HER COUSIN, SO I'M LIKE OK HAVE FUN. THEN DEIRDRE CALL ME AND TELLS ME SHE'S GANNA BE IN WEHO TO MEET HER ASS AT HERE. IM LIKE OK, LOL. SO I GET READY AND HEAD TO WEHO I GET TO HERE AND FIND DEIRDRE AND WE GRAB SOME DRINKS AND HIT THE DANCE FLOOR. THEN I SEE THIAGO AND THE SEC. HE SPOTS ME HE GETS THIS HUGE SMILE ON HIS FACE, LIKE YOU CAN JUST TELL HE WAS HAPPY TO SEE ME THERE. I GO OVER SAY HI, HUGS AND KISSES BUT I UNDERSTAND HE'S WORKING SO I LET HIM DO HIS THING AND I HEAD BACK TO THE DANCE FLOOR WITH DEIRDRE.

OK SO THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE ACTUALLY HUNG OUT WITH HER AND OMG SHE IS SO MUCH FUN AND SO DIRTY I LOVE IT. LETS JUST SAY WE GOT A COUPLE DANCERS TO PULL THERE UNDIES DOWN, YUMMY!!! LOL. AS THE NIGHT COMES TO AN END I SAY MY GOODBYES. THE NEXT DAY THIAGO SENDS ME A MSG; O! AND BEFORE I FORGET THIAGO USED MY REAL NAME LAST NIGHT, HE HAS NEVER USED IT BEFORE, I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY ABOUT THAT. OK BACK TO HIS MSG. SO HERE IT IS "ALEX!!!! GREAT SEEING YOU LAST NIGHT! DID YOU HAVE FUN??? YOU SHOULD COME TO WEHO MORE OFTEN!!! HAVE A GREAT SUNDAY!" HE'S SO SWEET. I MIGHT SEE HIM TUES NIGHT AGAIN, WE'LL SEE WHAT HAPPENDS. LATER ON SUNDAY I TOOK MY NEPHEW TO GO MEET THE CAST OF WIZARDS OF WAVERLY PLACE AND THEN RIGHT AFTER A CONCERT BY HONOR SOCIETY, HE HAD SO MUCH FUN BUT THATS ANOTHER BLOG. HERE ARE THE REST OF THE PICS ENJOY.

WHAT A WEEK

2009-09-04T22:04:00.000-07:00

MY GOD A LOT HAS HAPPENED SINCE LAST WEEKEND. LETS START WITH LAST SUNDAY. I WENT OUT TO CLUB LUCKY TO CONTINUE THE CELEBRATION OF ELLIOTS BIRTHDAY. BEFORE I EVEN GOT THERE IT JUST FELT LIKE IT WAS GOING TO BE A GOOD NIGHT. IT TURNED OUT TO BE AN AMAZING NIGHT ROBERT SHOWED UP WHO I LOVE. HE AND I JUST HIT IT OFF REALLY WELL SINCE THE DAY WE MET. ITS FUNNY HE TOLD ME THAT WE SHOULD HAVE MET YEARS AGO SO THAT WE COULD MAKE BABY'S, I WAS LIKE HELL WHATS WRONG WITH RIGHT NOW, LOL IT ALSO TURNES OUT VENUS WAS PERFORMING AND WE ALL KNOW THAT HER AND I ARE LIKE 2 PEAS IN A POD. SO SHE INVITES ME TO HER BIRTHDAY ON SAT BUT IM NOT REALLY WANTING TO GO ONLY FOR THE FACT THAT ITS IN RIVERSIDE. BUT THEN SHE TELLS ME I NEED TO BE THERE BECAUSE IT WOULD MEAN THE WORLD TO HER, SO NOW IM GOING, LOL. IM ACTUALLY EXCITED TO BE GOING NOW. IT WILL BE ME AND ELLIOT GOING TOGETHER SO IT SHOULD BE HELLA FUN. HERE ARE THE PICS FROM SUNDAY NIGHT.

MONDAY NIGHT WAS THE LAST NIGHT OF CELEBRATING MY BOYS 19TH BIRTHDAY, IT WAS SUCH AN AWSOME WEEKEND ALL TOGETHER. MY BOY ELLIOT DID HIS VERY FIRST DRAG SHOW AT HAMBURGER MARY'S IN LONG BEACH. HE WAS GOOD BUT WITH MORE PRACTICE HE WILL BE INCREDIBLE. DIDN'T STAY VERY LONG, AFTER THE SHOW I HUNG OUT WITH ELLIOT FOR ABOUT 20 MIN. THEN SAID MY GOODBYE'S.

NOW ONTO WED. NIGHT. I WAS HEADING HOME FROM WORK WHEN I GOT A MSG FROM THE LOVE OF MY LIFE AKA MY BABY DADDY, LOL, ROBERT. HE WANTED TO KNOW IF HE WOULD BE SEEING ME THAT NIGHT AT HOB. WHICH WAS A SURPRISE TO ME BECAUSE HE NEVER GOES TO HOB. SO I MSGED HIM BACK AND SAID YES AND WAS LIKE OMG ARE YOU GOING? SO HE ASSURED ME HE WOULD BE THERE WHICH JUST MADE MY DAY. I GET TO HOB THAT NIGHT AND I WAS SO EXCITED TO SEE HIM BECAUSE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. TURNED OUT HE WAS ALSO THERE WITH ELLIOT THEN JASON SHOWED UP AND LATER I MET BRANDON WHO IS SUCH A HOTTIE AND I SO WANT HIM, LOL. THE CLUB WAS DEAD THE WHOLE NIGHT BUT I HAD SO MUCH FUN JUST CHILLIN AND TALKING THE WHOLE NIGHT WITH ALL MY MEN AND MEETING NEW ONES. ENJOY THE PICS.

THEN CAME THURSDAY, IM TELLING YOU I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT HAPPENED. OK YES I WAS LATE TO WORK BECAUSE I WAS OUT THE NIGHT BEFORE. WHEN I FINALLY GOT TO WORK MY BOSS CALLED AND ALL SHE SAID WAS, "ALEX WHAT HAPPEN?" SHE WASN'T MEAN ABOUT IT, SHE WAS VERY CALM AND I JUST LOST IT. I STARTED CRYING AND WHEN I FINALLY WENT HOME AROUND 8:30AM I ENDED UP GETTING A TICKET BECAUSE IT WAS STREET SWEEPERS DAY AND I COMPLETLY FORGOT. I GET BACK TO WORK AND PARENTS ARE COMPLAINING ALL DAY LONG NON-STOP. IT WAS ONE OF THE WORST DAYS EVER. BY THE END OF THE DAY I JUST WENT HOME TOOK A LONG SHOWER AND JUST RELAXED IN MY ROOM. ENDING MY NIGHT EARLY. THATS BASICALLY HOW MY WEEK WENT. O AND DID I MENTION IM NOW BROKE, LOL. TOMORROW I WILL BE HEADING TO RIVERSIDE FOR VENUS' BDAY PARTY AND SUNDAY I WILL BE GOING TO CLUB LUCKY FOR A HOPEFULLY INCREDIBLE NIGHT WITH ROBERT, BRANDON, ELLIOT, JASON AND ANYONE ELSE I MIGHT MEET.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELLIOT

2009-08-30T01:02:00.000-07:00

SO ALL THIS WEEKEND I EM CELEBRATING ELLIOTS BIRTHDAY WITH HIM. HE IS TURNING 19 AND OMG I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. FRIDAY NIGHT WE WENT TO BOYBAR AT HAMBURGER MARRY'S IN LONG BEACH, MET A LOT OF PEOPLE AND A FEW REALLY HOT GUYS. AT FIRST THIS GUY NAMED CONRAD CAME UP TO ME WHEN HE SAW ME AND SAID, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? YOU NEVER COME HERE." I FOUND THAT TO BE SO FUNNY BECAUSE IT IS SO TRUE. THE PLACE, NO MATTER WHAT NIGHT YOU GO ON ITS ALWAYS DEAD. BUT HEY ITS ELLIOTS BDAY AND THAT'S WHERE HE WANTED TO BE. SO I MADE THE MOST OF IT. I MET THIS GUY NAMED NICK, VERY CUTE, LOVES FISH LOL. HE HAS A TATTOO ON HIS TUMMY AND A KOI FISH ON HIS LOWER BACK JUST ABOVE THE BOOTY. THEN MET THIS GUY NAMED JOHN, HIS WAS SO FREAKN HOT. SUCH A GREAT BODY AND SO FLEXABLE, I MEAN DAMN HE CAN PUT HIS LEGS SO FUCKN HI, LIKE OMG! ANYWAYS I ALSO THIS OTHER GUY NAMED JONATHAN AND HE IS SUCH A CUTIE. IT WAS SO FUNNY HE ASKED ME TO GO DANCE WITH HIM AND WHEN WE GOT ON THE DANCE FLOOR THE DJ STARTED LETTING EVERYONE KNOW THE PLACE WAS NOW CLOSED LOL. SO WE DIDNT GET TO DANCE BUT WE MIGHT THIS WED. ALSO MET THESE 2 GIRLS LISA AND RAFI, THEY ARE SO FUN TO BE WITH WE TALKED ALL NIGHT AND HAD SO MANY LAUGH'S. FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER I ACTUALLY HAD FUN AT BOYBAR. O AND I CAN'T FORGET ABOUT CODY HE'S A FRIEND OF MINE FROM WAY BACK. O! O! AND THERE WAS THIS ONE GUY WHO WAS SITTING WITH US THE WHOLE NIGHT BUT I CAN'T REMEBER HIS NAME. AT FIRST I WAS LIKE WHATEVER HE HAS THIS WHOLE HILBILLY HICK THING GOING ON BUT AS THE NIGHT WENT ON HE BECAME SO SEXY TO ME. HE WAS SEXY BECAUSE HE WAS FUNNY, HE HAD ALL THESE JOKES AND DIRTY, NASTY JOKES. HE WAS REALLY FUN TO TALK TOO AND ANYWAYS I'D LOVE TO HANG WITH HIM AGAIN. NOW BACK TO CELEBRATING ELLIOTS BDAY, HE ENDED UP ENTERING THE SEXY BOD CONTEST SO I DID TO AND IT WAS A CLOSE CALL BETWEEN HIM AND I, LOL, JUST KIDDING. BUT SERIOUSLY HE ENTERED AND WON A $100. SO AS ALWAYS HERE ARE THE PICTURES FROM THE NIGHT AND SUNDAY NIGHT WE WILL BE CELEBRATING HIS BDAY AT LUCKY SUNDAY'S IN IRVINE.

READY TO SAY GOODBYE

2009-08-30T00:25:00.000-07:00

HEY SEXY PEOPLE! OMG I HAVENT BLOGGED IN A WHILE. LET ME THINK, WHERE TO START. UMMMMMM............. OK, WELL WHEN I FIRST STARTED BLOGING I TOLD YOU ALL THAT I WAS GOING TO BLOG ABOUT EVERYTHING. CLUBS, FUN NIGHTS, SEX, DRAMA, ETC. AND SO FAR ITS BEEN ABOUT MY NIGHTS OUT. WELL HERE'S A LIL' SOMETHING MORE PERSONAL. AS WE ALL KNOW I LIKE THIAGO AND YES, I LIKE HIM MORE THAN JUST A FRIEND. THE OTHER NIGHT I WAS OUT AND FOR THE FIRST TIME I HEARD THAT HE HAS A BOYFRIEND AND THAT THEY HAVE MOVED IN TOGETHER. AT FIRST I WAS LIKE WHATEVER I'LL ASK ABOUT IT LATER RIGHT NOW I'M JUST GANNA HAVE FUN WITH MY FRIENDS. ANYWYAS LATER CAME AND I ASKED THIAGO IF HE HAD A BOYFRIEND. THIAGO SAID YES, HIS NAME IS PABLO AND THAT THEY ARE LIVING TOGETHER. NOW LETS BE HONEST, IT HURT. IT HURT BECAUSE IT MADE WHAT I ALREADY KNEW A REALITY. HE AND I COULD NEVER BE. HE WILL FOREVER REMAIN JUST A FANTASY.

I DON'T KNOW WHY I ALWAYS DO THAT TO MYSELF. I ALWAYS FALL FOR THE GUYS I CAN NEVER HAVE. I'M ALWAYS "THE FRIEND", ANYWAYS HERE'S THE THING, I BELIEAVE IN LOVE, I ALWAYS HAVE AND ALWAYS WILL. I BELIEVE THAT THERE IS SOMEONE OUT THERE FOR EVERYONE BUT I ALSO BELIEVE THAT THERE IS NO ONE OUT THERE FOR ME. AT FIRST WHEN I CAME TO REALIZE THAT, IT HURT LIKE HELL BECAUSE I'LL FORVER BE ALONE. I'LL NEVER WATCH A SUNSET WITH THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE. I'LL NEVER HAVE THOSE ARGUMENTS COUPLES ALWAYS HAVE. I'LL NEVER COME HOME KNOWING THAT HE'S THERE. I'LL NEVER HAVE TO BE JEALOUS. I'LL NEVER HAVE THOSE MOMENTS COUPLES SHARE THAT MAKE EVERYTHING WORTH IT ALL. I COULD GO ON AND ON BUT I'M READY TO SAY GOODBYE TO THE THOUGHT OF EVER FINDING "THE ONE". FROM NOW ON I'M JUST GOING TO LIVE LIFE THE BEST I CAN , HAVE FUN WITH MY FRIENDS AND ENJOY EVERY MOMENT I HAVE WITH THEM.

THIAGO POSTED THIS ON HIS FACEBOOK, "JUST BECAUSE SOMEBODY DOESN'T LOVE YOU THE WAY YOU WANT THEM TO, DOESN'T MEAN THEY DON'T LOVE YOU WITH ALL THEY HAVE.". THIS IS VERY TRUE BUT WHAT IF ITS NOT ENOUGH?

MAKE-UP IS SO MUCH FUN

2009-08-22T17:03:00.000-07:00

TODAY I GOT MY MAKE-UP DONE BY A GIRL THAT WORKS AT MAC. OMG I LOVED WHAT SHE DID I HAD TO DO A LIL' PHOTO SHOOT AT HOME SO I COULD POST HER WORK UP FOR ALL TO SEE. HERE ARE SOME PICS LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK. HAVE AN AWSOME WEEKEND EVERYONE, MUAH!!!

TIGERHEAT & FRESHMAN OF THE YEAR PARTY

2009-08-22T16:24:00.000-07:00

THURSDAY NIGHT WAS A LIL' FUN ALTHOGH IT KINDA STARTED OFF QUESTIONABLE. SO I WAS AT HOME DECIDING IF I SHOULD GO TO THIS NEW CLUB EVENT CALLED FREQUENCY AT THE SHARK CLUB. WELL I SAT THERE THINKING, SHOULD U GO, NOT GO, GO. FINALLY I DECIDE TO GO. I GET ALL READY, DO MY MAKE-UP, GET DRESSED, STOP AT THE BANK AND FINALLY GET ON THE FREEWAY. THEN IT HITS ME.......... ITS THURSDAY, FREQUENCY OPENED THE NIGHT BEFORE ON WEDNESDAY, LOL. SO I GET OFF THE FREEWAY AND PULL TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD. I'M ALL READY AND NOT WANTING TO GO BACK HOME, SO I THINK SOME MORE AND I FIGURED LETS GO TO TIGERHEAT. ITS BEEN WAY TO LONG SINCE I'VE BEEN THERE, PLUS A FEW OF MY FRIENDS ARE GOGO'S THERE SO IT WILL BE FUN TO SEE THEM.

I FINALLY HIT HOLLYWOOD AND VINE I WALK INTO THE CLUB, GRAB A DRINK AND HEAD UP STAIRS TO CHILL FOR A LIL' WHILE. TURNS OUT SAM AND STUART ARE UP THERE CHILLIN TOO, BEFORE THEY HAVE TO GO CHANGE AND GET READY TO GOGO. OMG I HAVEN'T SEEN THEM FOREVER AND I'VE MISSED THEM SO MUCH. I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!. WE TALKED FOR A LIL' WHILE THEN THEY HEADED DOWN STAIRS AND BACKSTAGE WHILE I HEADED TO THE DANCE FLOOR. TURNS OUT THAT THE CLUB WAS ALSO HOSTING THE FRESHMAN OF THE YEAR PARTY OF FRESHMEN MAGAZINE (A GAY PORN MAG.) AND GUESS WHAT MY FRIEND ZACK WON FRESHMAN OF THE YEAR, HE WILL BE ON THE COVER OF FRESHMEN'S SEPT. 09 ISSUE. THIS ALSO MAKE'S IT HIS SECOND YEAR. IM SO PROUD OF HIM. I LOVE YOU ZACK AND CONGRATULATIONS!!!

WHITE PARTY & MADONNA'S BDAY

2009-08-17T19:50:00.000-07:00

HEY EVERYONE SO TODAY I ACTUALLY FOUND OUT THAT PEOPLE ARE ACTUALLY READING MY BLOGS LOL. I HONESTLY DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WAS, THANK YOU, YOU ALL KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

NOW LETS TALK ABOUT LAST NIGHT, SUNDAY. I WENT TO CLUB LUCKY'S WHITE PARTY/MADANNA'S BDAY. IT WAS A GOOD NIGHT, PRETTY AWESOME. THE DRAG SHOW WAS FUNNY AND LOVED ALL THE MADANNA ACTS. I ENDED UP HANGING OUT WITH A GUY NAMED JASON, WHO I MET THERE A WEEK AGO. I ALSO HUNG WITH ELLIOT AND KYLE, O! LETS NOT FORGET MARIO, BRIAN, CLIFF, CARLA, CHRIS, TRAVIS AND A FEW OTHERS. I MUST SAY THE BEST THING ABOUT LAST NIGHT WAS WHEN ELLIOT ASKED ME IF I KNEW THAT I WAS HIS BABY. I WAS LIKE WHAT DO YOU MEAN? AND HE SAID, "YOUR MY BABY." THEN KISSED ME AND I DON'T MEAN A PECK ON THE CHEEK, I'M TALKING ON THE LIPS. DAMN THAT BOY IS SUPER CUTE. (HOPE HE DOESN'T READ THIS, LOL.) NOT MUCH ELSE TO SAY ABOUT LAST NIGHT SO HERE ARE THE PICTURES. MUAH!!!

WEHO!!!

2009-08-16T13:31:00.001-07:00

A WHILE BACK I MET A GUY ONLINE, HIS NAME IS GIOVANNI SUMMMERS. WE CHATTED FROM TIME TO TIME WHEN WE COULD. HE LIVES IN CHICAGO AND IS A WELL KNOW GAY PORN STAR. TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH I'V NEVER SEEN HIS WORK BUT GOT THIS PIC FROM HIS BLOG SO YOU CAN ALL SEE HIM IN ACTION. ANYWAYS SO GIO IS IN CALI VISITING AND LAST NIGHT WE MET IN WEHO (WEST HOLLYWOOD). I HAVENT BEEN THERE IN FOREVER, I KINDA FORGOT HOW FUN AND CROWDED IT WAS. BUT I LOVE IT. WE MET OUTSIDE OF A COFFEE SHOP, I WAS KINDA RUNNING LATE, LIKE AN HOUR LOL, BUT ITS ALL GOOD. WE THEN HEADED TO HERE, GRABBED A DRINK DANCED A LIL AND HE GOT TO MEET CHICHI LARUE, HE LOVES HER, HE WAS SO STARSTRUCK IT WAS SO CUTE. THEN WENT OUTSIDE TO TALK AND ALL OF A SUDDEN I HEAR, "COCO!" AND IT WAS JAYDEN TAYLOR, ANOTHER GAY PORN STAR AND GOOD FRIEND. I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM, I LOVE HIM. AS GIO AND I WERE TALKING PHILLIP ASHTON WALKS OR SHOULD I SAY STUMBLES OVER TO US LOL. HE SAY'S HELLO TO GIO AND THEN SEE'S ME AND SAY'S, "THERE'S MY COCO!" AND GIVE'S ME A HUGE HUG AND KISSES ME ALL OVER. I LOVED IT I WAS SO SO HAPPY HE SHOWED UP. HE'S VISITING FROM AZ. BUT THE GOOD THING IS, HE'S MOVING BACK TO CALI. SOON. AND YES PHILLIP IS ALSO A GAY PORN STAR. DAMN I KNOW WAY TO MANY PORN STARS LOL. O WELL. AFTER HERE WE HEADED TO RAGE TO MEET UP WITH A COUPLE OF OTHER FRIENDS OF MINE, PARIS AND AIDEN. WE GRABBED ANOTHER DRINK AND DANCED FOR AWHILE. DAMN IT WAS FUN BUT WAY TO HOT. SO GIO AND I WENT OUTSIDE TO TALK SOME MORE. THEN I HEARD "COCO!" AGAIN LOL AND I TURNED TO SEE GIL, HE'S AN AWSOME GUY AND GOOD FRIEND. AFTER RAGE WE HEADED TO ELEVEN AND GOT IN FREE THERE AND JUST CHILLED THERE. BY THIS TIME EVERYTHING STARTED TO CLOSE AND GIO, I THINK WAS STARTING TO GET OVER THE WHOLE NIGHT. SO HE SAID GOODBYE AND GOODNIGHT. I LOVE YOU GIOVASNNI!!! AIDEN, PARIS AND I START HEADING BACK TO THE CAR BUT NOT REALLY IN THE MOOD TO LEAVE JUST YET, SO WE KINDA JUST CHILLED ON THE SIDEWALK AND THIS GUY COMES UP TO US AND INVITES US TO AN AFTER PARTY AT HIS FRIENDS. ITS SO FUNNY BECAUSE HE CALLS HIS FRIEND UP TO MAKE SURE ITS OK IF WE COME AND HE'S DISCRIBING US TO HIS FRIEND. HE SAY'S, "THERE'S 3 CUTIES AND ONE'S CHUNKY JUST LIKE ME." I STARTED BUSTING UP IT WAS SO CUTE AND FUNNY. BUT WE DIDN'T GO BECAUSE THERE WAS GOING TO BE A HOLE LOT OF DRUGS THERE. IT WAS A DOP PARTY, NOT MY STYLE. THEN I SAW THIS GUY WAISTED AND WALKING WITH HIS FRIEND AND I ASKED HIS FRIEND IF THE GUY'S NAME IS PAUL AND IT WAS OMG I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM TOO. I LOVE HIM. PAUL IS A GOGO DANCER AND I MET HIM AT CLUB LUCKY HOUSE OF BLUES. HE'S A CUTIE. GOT SOME BIG HUGES AND KISSES THERE. WE TALKED AND TALKED AND TURNS OUT THAT PAULS FRIEND DANCES WITH THIAGO, I THINK HIS NAME WAS PESH SOMETHING LIKE THAT. ANYWAYS HE TELLS ME THAT HE THINKS THIAGO MOVED IN WITH HIS BOYFRIEND. WHAT THE HELL!!! THIAGO HAS A BOYFRIEND? FUCK!!! ANYWAYS AFTER TALKING WITH HIM WE FINALLY DECIDE TO LEAVE. IT WAS AN AWSOME NIGHT AND NO FIGHTS THANK GOD. SO HERE ARE THE REST OF THE PICTURES. ENJOY!!!

ONE OF THE BEST NIGHT'S EVER

2009-08-14T23:50:00.000-07:00

HEY EVERYONE; SO HERE'S WHAT HAPPEND WED. I HAD JUST GOTN OUT OF WORK WHEN AN OLD FRIEND CALLED ME. HIS NAME IS AIDEN, HE ASKED ME IF I WAS GOING TO BE GOING TO HOB. HELLO! OF COURSE I EM'. SO LATER THAT NIGHT I GO TO HIS HOUSE AND AIDEN, HIS BOYFRIEND PARIS AND I ALL GET READY THERE. AIDEN OF COURSE BECOME'S MISS GAGA AND PARIS IS LOOKING FABULOUS WITH ALL HIS MAKE-UP ON. I ON THE OTHER HAND HAD NO CLUE WHAT TO DO WITH MY FACE. I BEGAN TO PUT MAKE-UP ON BUT IT JUST WASNT LOOKING RIGHT, SO I TOOK IT ALL OFF AND ASKED PARIS TO DO MY MAKE-UP FOR THE NIGHT. I MUST SAY IT TURNED OUT VERY GOOD BUT IT WASNT ENOUGH SO I ADDED SOME LINES AND SPARKLES AND OF COURSE GLITTER LOL. THE END RESLUT WAS JUST "OK" BUT I WASNT GOING TO START OVER. I'LL HAVE TO MAKE UP FOR IT NEXT TIME, LOL. ANYWAYS SO WE FINALLY GET TO THE CLUB AND THE MUSIC WAS BUMPING THE DRINK STARTED FLOWING IT WAS FEELING LIKE A GOOD NIGHT. SO I MAKE MY WAY DOWN STAIRS TO THE DANCE FLOOR AND I END UP RUNNING INTO THIS LADY THAT I ALWAYS DANCE WITH. SORRY I CAN'T REMEMBER HER NAME. THE GREAT THING, SHE'S RIGHT BY THE STAGE WHERE I LIKE TO BE. SO I MAKE MY WAY TO HER AND I START DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY. THEN MAMA COME'S ON STAGE AND AND STARTS THE NIGHT OFF AND INTRODUCES THE GO-GO'S. SO OUT COME FAIRIE, HE IS SUCH A GREAT DANCER AND JUST A FUN GUY. YOU KNOW I LOVE HIM. OUT COME THE REST OF THE DANCERS AND THEN MY BOY COME'S OUT, THIAGO. HE SPOTS ME AND COME'S TO SAY HI AND GIVE ME A HUG AND KISS. LATER MY FRIENDS AIDEN AND PARIS FINALLY MAKE THIER WAY TO THE DANCE FLOOR BUT NOW THEIR DRUNK AND ALREADY STARTING FIGHTS. NOT A GOOD THING. SO LONG STORY SHORT THEY ENDED UP GETTING KICKED OUT AND BECAUSE THEY COULDN'T FIND ME THEY WENT HOME WITH ANOTHER FRIEND. I AT THE TIME DIDN'T KNOW THAT AND ENDED UP STAYING THE WHOLE NIGHT AT THE CLUB AND DIN'T GET HOME TILL ABOUT 3AM. AND I HAD TO GET UP AT 5AM FOR WORK. NOT ONLY THAT BUT WORK WAS GOING TO BE AT THE LA ZOO FROM 7AM TILL 530 PM. IT WAS A VERY, VERY LONG DAY. OK SO I STAYED THE WHOLE NIGHT AND IT WAS ACTUALLY A GOOD THING BECAUSE I ENDED UP SEEING JOSH AND HE AND I DANCE THE REST OF THE NIGHT TOGETHER. I ALSO RAN INTO A GIRL I MET ON FACEBOOK, SHE TURNED OUT TO BE A REALLY COOL GIRL. LATER THAT NIGHT WHILE I WAS DANCING THIAGO GAVE ME A GIFT. HE GAVE ME A BRACELET. THAT JUST MADE ME FEEL SO HAPPY AND WARM INSIDE AND JUST TRULLY MADE MY NIGHT. I ALSO RAN INTO MARIO WHO I MET THROUGH AIDEN, HE'S A REALLY GREAT GUY. AFTER THE CLUB CLOSEED I ENDED UP RUNNING INTO YURI AGAIN, I LOVE HIM AND I RAN INTO PARIS HILTON'S NEW BFF, STEPHEN. HE AND I CHILLED FOR AWHILE AND YES WE TOOK PICS. BY THE TIME WE FINISHED THIAGO WAS OFF THE STAGE AND DRESSED . SO HE AND I ACTUALLY GOT TO HANG UT FOR AWHILE AND OF COURSE TAKE PICTURES LOL. THEN JOSH AND I KICKED IT IN THE PARKING LOT FOR A GOOD WHILE JUST TALKING AND LOOKING FOR A GUY HE WAS INTO, LOL. NO LUCK, COULDN'T FIND HIM. THEN WE FINALLY CALLED IT A NIGHT AND WE ALL WENT HOME. IT AS DEFINETLY ONE OF THE BEST NIGHT EVER. IT WAS THE KIND OF FUN I NEEDED TO HAVE AND HAVEN'T HAD IN A LONG TIME. I LOVE YOU JOSHUA!!!! I LOVE YOU THIAGO!!!!!

CALLING IT A SHORT NIGHT

2009-08-10T19:38:00.000-07:00

OK SO ABOUT LAST NIGHT. I WASN'T GOING TO GO TO LUCKY SUNDAY'S BECAUSE I WAS BROKE LIKE NO JOKE, I HAD $6 IN MY ACCOUNT AND NO GAS. THEN MY FRIEND ROBERT WHO I LOVE MSGD ME ON FACEBOOK SAYING I NEED TO GO TONIGHT BECAUSE ITS HIS FIRST NIGHT BACK TO WORK SINCE HE BROKE HIS FOOT. THAT MADE ME WANT TO GO EVEN MORE BECAUSE I LOVE HIM AND MISSED HIM LIKE CRAZY. BUT STILL NO MONEY, NO GO. THEN HE MSGED ME SAYN I NEED TO GET MY ASS THERE CUZ ITS ON THE LIST. I WAS LIKE OMG, BUT STILL HAD THE PROBLEM OF NOT HAVING ANY GAS. SO I THOUGHT AND THOUGHT AND FINALLY I STARTED COUNTING MY CHANGE LOL. I GOT $25 OUT OF IT SO THAT TOTALLY WORKED OUT. I WAS ABLE TO GET GAS, ABLE TO GO AND ABLE TO SEE ROBERT. IT FELT SO GOOD TO SEE HIM AND HUG HIM, I REALLY MISSED HIM. I LOVE YOU!!!

OK BEFORE I CONTINUE ON WITH THE REST OF THE NIGHT AND TRUTH BE TOLD IT WAS A SHORT NIGHT. I HAVE TO TELL YOU ABOUT THE DRAG SHOW. FIRST WE WELCOMED BACK MORGAN WHO WAS VISITING FAMILY OUT OF STATE. SHE DID A COUPLE OF P!NK NUMBERS AND USUAL, SHE WAS AWSOME. THEN ENDED THE NIGHT WITH A NUMBER I LOVE WATCHING HER PERFORM, "I WANNA BIG DICK". IT WAS HILARIOUS, IT STARTED OFF GREAT THEN SHE WENT INTO THE AUDIENCE AND WAS INCLUDING PEOPLE INTO HER ACT. SHE STARTED SHAKEN HER HEAD LIKE CRAZY SAY THAT THE GUYS DICK WAS OMG HUGE AND HER WIG WENT FLYN OFF THEN LATER MAYHEM WAS PASSING THROUGH AND ENDED UP FINISHING THE NUMBER WITH HER. IT WAS JUST INCREDIBLE. LATER MAYHEM TOOK THE STAGE AND DID A FEW AWSOME NUMBERS AND ONE INVOLVING CRACK ALL OVER HER NOSE LOL. SERIOUSLY YOU ALL HAVE TO CHECK IT OUT ONE NIGHT.

AFTER THE SHOW I RAN INTO A GUY I MET A LIL MORE THAN A YEAR AGO, HIS NAME IS YURI. I MET HIM WHEN HE WAS A GOGO DANCER AT CLUB LUCKY HOUSE OF BLUES. NEEDLESS TO SAY IV LOVED HIM SINCE THE DAY I MET HIM AND IT WAS REALLY GREAT TO SEE HIM AGAIN. HE HASNT BEEN COMING OUT LATELY MOSTLY BECAUSE HE'S BEEN IN A RELATIONSHIIP AND WE ALL KNOW HOW THAT GOES, LOL. SERIOUSLY THO I'M SO HAPPY HE'S FOUND SOMEONE.

AFTER CATCHING UP WITH YURI AND TALKING WITH MY GIRL MAYHEM I SAID MY GOODBYE'S. I CALLED IT AN EARLY NIGHT BECAUSE HONESTLY I FELT ALONE AND SAD. BUT ITS ALL GOOD NOW. AND I'LL BE HEADING TO CLUB LUCKY HOUSE OF BLUES THIS WED. TO SEE THIAGO THE LOVE OF MY LIFE LOL. AND OF COURSE TO DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY. SO HERE ARE THE REST OF THE PICTURES FROM LAST NIGHT AND A COUPLE OF PICTURES OF YURI AS A GOGO.

LUCKY SUNDAY'S

2009-08-03T19:18:00.000-07:00

LAST NIGHT WAS FUN, I WENT TO LUCKY SUNDAY'S LIKE I ALWAYS DO. FIRST I RAN INTO JONATHAN AND CARLOS, I LOVE THOSE GUYS. WE SAT AND TALKED FOR THE LONGEST TIME JUST CATCHING UP. THEN I GOT A MSG FROM ANOTHER FRIEND ASKING IF I WAS GANNA BE THERE. I WAS LIKE IM ALREADY HERE LOL. SO HE ENDED UP COMING AND I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN FOREVER SO I WAS SO EXCITED TO SEE HIM. I LOVE YOU BRUNO!!!

I MET BRUNO'S FRIEND LEXIE AND SHE IS AWSOME, SERIOUSLY SHE IS SO MUCH FUN. THEN I WENT BACK TO JONATHAN AND CARLOS AND ENDED UP MEETING A STR8 GUY NAMED CARLOS. NOW GET THIS, HIS FRIENDS (GIRLS) BROUGHT HIM TO LUCKY'S AND DIDN'T TELL HIM IT WAS A GAY CLUB LOL. BUT HE WAS COOL ABOUT IT, HE ACTUALLY LIKED THE DRAG SHOW, EVEN THOUGHT THEY HAD BETTER BODIES THEN THE GIRLS AT THE CLUB LOL. PLUS HE JUST HAD FUN AND WEN WITH THE FLOW WHICH IS REALLY AWSOME. SO OTHER THEN THAT NOT MUCH ELSE WENT ON LAST NIGHT SO HERES THE PICS, ENJOY. MUAH!!!

PORN STARS

2009-07-31T23:59:00.000-07:00

SO THE OTHER NIGHT I WAS OUT WITH A FRIEND AND HE TELLS ME THAT SOME GUY IS TALKING SHIT ABOUT ME. SAYING THAT IM SOME FREAK OBSESSED WITH PORN STARS. WELL THE TRUTH IS I'M NOT OBSESSED WITH PORN STARS. A FEW ARE ACTUALLY FRIENDS OF MINE, ZACK, PHILLIP, ACE, NIKO AND TURK. ANYWAYS HERE ARE SOME PICS OF MY FRIENDS DOING THEIR JOB AND THEN PICS OF ME AND THEM HANGING OUT AT CLUBS, GAY PRIDE AND WHAT NOT. LOVE YOU GUYS. O AND MY NEW FRIEND CODY WHO WILL BE IN TOWN THIS MONTH. WE GANNA HIT SOME CLUBS UP IN WEHO. CAN'T WAIT. WOOO!!!

KAT GRAHAM

2009-07-31T23:10:00.000-07:00

OK I GOT TO BE HONEST WHEN I HEARD SHE WAS GOING TO BE PERFORMING AT LUCKY'S SUNDAY'S I HAD NO CLUE WHO SHE WAS LOL. WHEN I ASKED AROUND ALL EVERYONE SAID IS, "SHE USE TO BE THE STAWBERRY FANTA GIRL." I WAS LIKE UMM, OK.

SO I DID A LIL' RESEARCH OF MY OWN AND TURNS OUT, NOT ONLY IS SHE AND ACTRESS THAT WILL BE STARING IN THE NEW TV SERIES "VAMPIRE DIARIES" ON THE CW. SHE IS ALSO A FABULOUSE SINGER WITH THE HIT SINGLE "BOOM KAT" AND A GAY RIGHTS ACTIVIST.

AFTER FINDING OUT WHO SHE IS I HAD TO GO SEE HER PERFORM AND OMG I'M SO VERY GLAD I DID. SHE ROCKED THE CLUB THAT NIGHT. AFTER HER PERFORMANCE SHE SHE EVEN CAME DONE TO THE DANCE FLOOR AND DANCED HER ASS OFF WITH EVERYONE JUST HAVING FUN. I FINALLY WENT UP TO HER AND INTRODUCED MYSELF AND WE ENDED UP TALKING FOR A WHILE AND THEN TOOK SOME PICTURE FOR THE CLUB. SHE'S AN AWSOME GIRL, VERY SWEET AND OMG SO TINY LOL. ANYWAYS I LOVE HER SHE'S A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE NOW. HERE'S SOME MORE PICS FROM HER PERFORMANCE AND THE REST OF THAT NIGHT.

www.myspace.com/kgexperience

WED. NIGHT!!!

2009-07-31T17:50:00.000-07:00

HEY LOVERS, SO WED. NIGHT I WENT OUT TO CLUB LUCKY, HOUSE OF BLUES IN DOWNTOWN DISNEY. OMFG IT WAS TRULY AN AMAZING NIGHT. ROBERT IS BACK TO WORKING AT THE DOOR, STILL HAS A CAST/BOOT THING ON HIS FOOT BUT HE'S DOING GREAT AND I'VE MISSED HIM SO MUCH. I'M HAPPY HE'S BACK. ROBERT I LOVE YOU!!!

I HIT THE DANCE FLOOR WITH A LADY FRIEND, (SRY I CAN NEVER REMEMBER HER NAME, LOL). ANYWAYS DANCED MY ASS OFF AND HAD SO MUCH FUN. THEN THIAGO, JOSHUA AND THE REST OF THE GOGO'S CAME OUT AND DID THERE THING. THIAGO CAME AND KISSED ME, (A FEW TIMES, YUMMY). THEN HAD ME TOUCH HIM IN VERY NAUGHTY WAYS. THEN JOSHUA CAME BY AND SAID HELLO. WE TALKED A BIT THEN HE TOOK MY PHONE AND PUT HIS NUMBER IN IT. THE GUY NEXT TO ME WAS LIKE "WHAT? ARE YOU SERIOUS?!" LOL . JOSH AND I HAD LOTS OF FUN THROUGH OUT THE NIGHT, JUST PLAYN AROUND. I LOVE YOU JOSHUA AND THIAGO, YOU BOTH KNOW THAT. I'LL SEE YOU SUNDAY. MUAH!!!
OK SO THERE'S THIS ONE GOGO WHO KNOWS ME AND TALKS TO ME ALL THE TIME. BUT I CAN'T REMEMBER HIS NAME NOT EVEN TO SAVE MY LIFE OMG SOMEONE TELL ME HIS NAME!!!! LOL SERIOUS THO I JUST FEEL BAD NOT KNOWING HIS NAME. OTHER THEN THAT IT WAS A VERY FUN NIGHT.

MY WEEKEND

2009-07-27T21:30:00.000-07:00

OK SO THIS PAST WEEKEND STARTED OFF VERY RELAXING, IN OTHER WORDS BORING LOL. i WENT TO WORK FRIDAY MORNING AT 6:45AM BY 11AM THERE WASNT MUCH KIDS SO I TOLD MY DIRECTOR THAT I WAS JUST GANNA GO HOME. SHE SAID OK AND THAT SHE WOULD MARK ME IN AS IF I WAS THERE ALL DAY. i LOVE HER =).

WHEN I GOT HOME I WASNT PLANNING ON DOING MUCH OF ANYTHING, MAYBE SLEEP. THEN I THOUGHT "HEY WHY NOT DO A PHOTO SHOOT." SO I GOT OUT THE MAKE-UP AND CAMERA AND CAME OUT WITH THIS...

SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?

ON SAT. I DID NOTHING =( BUT ON SUN. I WASNT SURE IF I WANTED TO GO OUT TILL MY FRIEND ELLIOT MESSAGED ME TELLING ME THAT I BETTER HAVE MY ASS AT LUCKY SUNDAY'S CUZ HE WAS GOING TO BE THERE. I WAS LIKE HELL I'M GETTING READY RIGHT NOW. SO ONCE AGAIN PUT ON MY MAKE-UP AND GOT ALL GLITTERFIED AND HEADED OUT. TURNS OUT MY FRIEND KRYSTAL CAME DOWN TO OC FROM UP NORTH. I'VE MISSED HER BUT DIDN'T REALIZE HOW MUCH TILL LAST NIGHT. OMG I LOVE HER. I HAD A FEW DRINKS, DANCED ALL NIGHT, CHATTED IT UP WITH MY GIRL MAYHEM, I LOVE THAT BITCH WITH ALL MY HEART. MET A COUPLE OF GUYS AND JUST HAD SO MUCH FUN WHICH I SO, SO NEEDED. HERE ARE THE PICS FROM LAST NIGHT.

NOW I CAN'T WAIT FOR WED. TO COME. I'LL BE HEADING TO CLUB LUCKY'S AT HOUSE OF BLUES IN DOWNTOWN DISNEY. BESIDE'S THE DANCING AND THE PERFORMANCES AND THE DRINKS AND HANGING WITH ALL MY FRIENDS. I MUST SAY I TRULY ONLY GO TO SEE THIAGO. I LOVE HIM.

WELCOME

2009-07-27T17:13:00.000-07:00

HEY EVERYONE WELCOME TO MY FIRST PAGE. THIS IS MY VERY FIRST BLOG SO IM STILL WORKING ALL THE KINKS OUT AND SETTING IT ALL UP. THEN I'LL BE BLOGGING ABOUT ALL KINDS OF SHIT. HOW MY WEEKEND WAS, HOW THE CLUB WAS, MY PERSONAL LIFE, YES EVEN THE DRAMA LOL. PLUS LOTS MORE. SO HOPE YOU LIKE AND PLEASE LEAVE COMMENT, GOOD OR BAD I LOVE TO READ THEM.

MUAH!!!
XOXO
COCO